WE WILL NEVER FORGET...
The original WEB Tribute Site as recorded by the Internet Archive Wayback Machine
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Quiet as is proper for such places;
The street, subdued, half-snow, half-rain,
Endless, but ending in the darkened doors.
Inside, they who will be there always,
Quiet as is proper for such people--
Enough for now to be here, and
To know my door is one of these.
- Robert Creeley
Welcome to the William Eugene Burton Tribute Website
Here we will explore the life of one amazing human being, a true creative soul. An artist and writer, a person with ideas and the motivation to make them real. Someone we will miss terribly, not only because he was intelligent and funny and passionate, but because he will no longer be able to CREATE.
What can we do but appreciate the creativity he left behind for us? What is left but to remember who he was and make sure that all he has done is never forgotten.
This site is a tribute to Beau...
I will miss you my friend, deeply, and I hope that you're able to keep on creating where you are now. Surely a better place than this.
- T.A. Gorton aka tWISTEd sPINe
DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE
William Eugene Burton's life was cut short because of a drunk driver.
Let's repeat that, because its important to understand what it means.
William Eugene Burton's life was cut short because of a drunk driver.
He does not get another day. He will never create another piece of art, or write another story to share with the world. He does not get the chance to realize his dreams. Never again will he be able to spend a Holiday with his family. All the moments of his life that SHOULD HAVE come to pass are now rendered empty.
All this because someone drank alcohol and decided to drive a vehicle. A life stolen, for what? To save a few dollars on cab fair? To avoid sleeping on a friend's couch?
How many amazing people will lose their lives this way? How much sadness will we allow for something so easily avoided?
PLEASE!!! Make a difference. Stand up and be heard. If you see someone getting behind the wheel after drinking, stop them. Do what you have to do, even if you don't know them personally. Together, we can stop another tragedy from taking place.
Visit and become part of an organization trying to make a difference:
Mothers Against Drunk Driving
Students Against Destructive Decisions
CONTRIBUTE to this WEBSITE
Did you know WEB? Are you a friend or family member that would like to add something to WEB's Tribute site? Or, perhaps you have come across this site and been moved by his artwork or writing?
The goal of this Tribute is to ensure that Beau is never forgotten. We are always accepting contributions, even if you did not know him personally but just feel inspired to offer something; poetry, sentiments, words, music... there are no limitations.
For further information, please contact T.A. Gorton (aka tWISTEd sPINe) at:
twistedspine@darkchamber.com
The Crow Inspired Artwork
The Crow was a big part of WEB's creative universe. His passing leaves a HUGE hole in the online Crow community, especially The Crow CHAMBEROOM, where WEB always had unique ideas to share and constantly impressed us all with his creative energy. In this gallery are pieces inspired in some way by The Crow.
The Artwork of W. E. Burton
While the Crow was at the center of WEB's creativity, he did many different things. In this gallery you can explore his various work.
UNFINISHED PROJECTS
One of the most difficult aspects of creating this Tribute site is right here. There are so many projects that WEB was working on, projects he will not be able to complete.
:::CEMETERY GIRL:::
Cemetery Girl Page 1
Cemetery Girl was WEB's baby, his fully original concept that would have no doubt earned him a huge fanbase, and perhaps found publication with a major comic company. Unique, darkly humorous, and fused with WEB's original visual style, Cemetery Girl is quite special.
16 pages of CG were penciled by Beau before he passed away, and thanks to his brother Duncan and others involved, those pages will be completed and brought to full color life in the not too distant future.
Original
concept, story, and art work by Beau
Burton
Coloring,
inking, and lettering by Shawn
Darling
Page 1
Issue 1
Part One
"HOW HAIRY YOU ARE"
or
CEMETERY GIRL
vs.
THE WOLFMAN
TRIBUTE GALLERY
Here family and friends of WEB offer something of themselves to ensure his memory lives on. Click a name to view each person's contribution.
Bud Cook aka Draven Maniac
Moon Mistress
Eric C. (Neo)
Arykh
Stacie Smakal
XvXDestinyXvX
Deaderman
Salem Crow
tWISTEd sPINe
Moon Mistress
Why have you gone
taken way too soon
ne'er to be undone
be with wind, sun, and moon
End of a friendship just begun
a bond of heart
forged with a special one
in whose life I was a part
But forgotten ne'er will you
be
though time is short and passes by
a memory so dear to me
with eagle's wings you now fly
Beau, I miss you.
Take care, my
friend. See you on the other side.
Eric C. (Neo)
I sat down thinking about WEB and how he was taken from us much too soon. I just listened to my emotions and tried to make a song that reflected them, hence the name "Reflection". I was thinking about him, his artwork, his passionate posts at The Chamberoom.....about his family outside the cyberworld that now has to cope with this terrible tragedy. I just wanted to let them know that he will never be forgotten by his online family and our thoughts and prayers are with you. This song is dedicated to him and his family.
Reflection - Original Mix for WEB
(right click and save target as)
Arykh
The Writing on the Wall, A Road Now Traveled
(In Dedication to WEB)
Climbing the hills and mountains of our soul, we encounter obstacles that
it is hard to believe anyone else could share. So we struggle on or give
up. This is a story of someone who didn't give up. Someone who is gone
but is still here and will remain here forever.
The hills were enormous. The valleys stooped down so low you could not see
the bottom. But as the road less traveled had become the highway of his
soul he decided not to stop where everyone else would say whoa. Jumping to
a stance like a bird taking flight wings spread from shoulder to
shoulder. His arms outstretched, he dives for the bottom. Clouds passing
him as he soars across the open ranges. His wings black and gold carried
him for a long time till finally he decided to land once again. When he
landed he looked around. The mountains had ended. Just luscious, flat,
green, open meadows remained. A home sat to the far back and he could tell
from a glance exactly where he was. His wings disappeared for he knew he
would not need them anymore.
He began to run like a child to a parent. A feeling, a sensation that had
no end. A face appeared from beyond the homes door and he came to a sudden
stop. There before him stood a face. A face of pure beauty. A face so
wondrous that description itself fell short of any words that could speak
the beauty of the name.
That is when the face kneeled down before him and said as it opened its
arms, "Well done my young one. You have soared as a bird yet with no
wings, you have climbed quicker then a tiger searching chasing the next
meal, but mostly you have been true to your beliefs, your heart, and your
friends more then many neighbors in countries of the world. Though you be
with flaws just as any of them do, you stand before me now tall and
undefeated. You are strong and now pure. Just as promised in times past,
I give you this new world to explore. The challenge is over, the journey
complete. In time your friends will come as well but until then you may
visit as you wish. They will not see you but your presence shall be
felt. However, now you must rest for your journey is over. Your piece
does begin."
He laid down his thoughts and cradled his dreams. So much left needed to
be done. But the time just did not allow. Why did it not allow he
thought. It began to puzzle him too much. But then he realized where he
now stood once again and all this was gone. He walked to the water of a
near pond and looked down at his reflection. It too had changed without
any feeling of change at all. He too was now beyond expression, yet he
knew exactly what had happened. He walked back to the home and opened the
door. Inside was all he had ever dreamed, all he had ever wished. He was
finally able to rest. He sat down at he drawing table that was gathered in
a corner by the window. He began to sketch faces he had never seen
before. He knew the faces but only as names. Then other faces appeared
that he knew before even drawn. A mural he began to sketch took detail and
shape with a simple thought of his will, and the wall was covered with the
piece that he wanted and knew. The faces on the wall were his friends and
family his own salvation achieved. Each one distinct in it's own way. The
brother he knew was in color. The leader of a board he loved was there
with pencils and pens by his side, others too from the board existed and
his life reflected back. Finally he came to the final stage of his
mural. The finishing touch to complete it all. He drew slowly a line to
connect each and everyone. A web was formed that brought tears to his
eyes. But upon the completion of his web he saw what he had done. The
sketches took life and he could see each member as if standing beside them
all. They all traveled along their own webs. Through mountains their
own. He could see their challenges and help guide them through. Even in
rest he did not give up on his friends. He was at piece and happy. His
Web was complete.
Goodbye dear friend WEB. You will be missed greatly. But even as we sit
at our computers or walk through the mountains and valleys of life, we know
you will be there with us. We know you will help us weave our own webs and
in time will see you as well. We love you friend. Now go be at piece and
remember that when you want to see us again just look at the mural. We
will be here, just as you are here for us.
R.I.P. WEB
Beloved friend and fellow fan of The Crow
Stacie Smakal
I can't believe he's gone
So maybe I won't
So many ideas
And projects
And friends
And family
And now he's gone
But legacy's live on
And ideas
And friends
And family
Continuing forever on
I've scanned the heavens
For that newest star
And found a bright one
I've never seen before
Or maybe didn't see before
But it's here now
Burning on for eternity
For thousands of generations more
Like ideas
And friends
And family
Lagacy's and love last forever
While hearts may ache
And memories bring tears of all kinds
Nothing can steal forever.
XvXDestinyXvX
Crow Reunion
A friend is gone and it
hurts badly.
But with our loss must
know that on this
sad night,
Heaven has gained an
angel.
With his silvery wings
and crow paint upon
his face,
He awaits our reunion on
the golden streets
above.
By: XvXDestinyXvX
April 16, 2002
Deaderman (aka
I hope he has found his way home
I knew him a bit but not as much as I should
taken from us by demons who sought to derail him
he defended his opinion valiantly
Fire Of Passions he read
gave his thought....I gave nay to his word then
but now I see he was defending what he believed in
Share your space with HIM, and D
But if I have anything else to say
please help me to become as good as you were
let me continue your journey as a tribute to you
My fellow Brother Crow.
I will never forget you nor will anyone else.
May you fly with angels and converse with crows
And to sum it up, fly forever.
Eric "The Salem Crow" Darrah
Life is precious.
We all know this,
But it usually takes something
Drastic to make us
Realize it.
I sit here now,
Thinking about a friend.
Someone whom I did not know
In flesh and blood;
Yet someone who I admired.
I never had a chance
To really get to know him;
And now it'll never happen.
All because of a drunk driver.
A person who thought
They could safely handle a motor vehicle,
Even after consuming a fair amount of alcohol.
Because of that arrogant attitude,
We lost:
A friend;
A brother;
A son;
A writer;
An artist;
A good soul;
More importantly;
We lost an innocent human being.
We'll never:
See another new piece of artwork,
Read any new stories,
Have another passionate conversation,
We'll never… see…Beau…again…
Rest in Peace my friend…
May your soul soar with the enchanted ones…
Eric "The Salem Crow" Darrah
T.A. Gorton aka tWISTEd sPINe
Best I Can Do
I begin my day
From bed, to hall, to bathroom sink.
I wake to all my dreams
Not yet come true.
The ambitions of my life
Resting on shelves like dusty trophies.
This waking to possibility,
It may be the best of life.
Not knowing but hoping…
And I see your art on the wall,
A little piece of you in my world.
Your hands, your passion, your vision,
And its enough to make me scream.
Your days of infinite possibility are gone now.
Your dreams will sit untouched. Forever.
I reach up to dust the idea of becoming an author.
And how I wish I could reach to YOUR perfect dreamer's trophy;
Dust it for you,
Make it real,
Bring you back,
Fuse this world with every hope you ever had.
But I can't.
All I can do is push on,
Push through
To my own vision of perfect.
And when I get there,
I'll share my trophy with you,
With your memory,
With everything you meant to this world.
This is the best I can do.
- tWISTEd sPINe
also read...
DAILY LOGIC: Don't Drink And Drive
Daily Logic #59 | 04.04.02
DON'T DRINK AND DRIVE
I just found out…a friend of mine has died.
A creative soul.
You see, there was this drunk driver…
God damn.
You wake up and you breathe, you walk, you smile at sunlight falling across the floor. And all along, a friend has been taken away. Their life stolen.
You see, there was this fucking drunk driver…
And then I remember, like a punch in the face. I have driven a car after drinking too. I've emerged into a crisp 2am night, feeling alive and buzzing with the colors of invincibility. I have strutted down sidewalks cackling the jive of poison, loving the stars and the bodies in motion on either side. Out with friends. Drumroll please, key the rock n' roll soundtrack for a rebel with no brain.
Let's drive home. Fuck the cab. I spent all my cash on screwdrivers and bad juke box music.
Let's drive home.
I have killed my friend. Not directly. I mean, I wasn't behind the wheel of the metal beast that took his life. But I've done the evil deed. I've taken the wheel in my hands and put my foot to the pedal knowing it was wrong.
It could have been me. I'm guilty.
I just found out…a friend, this great creative mind…he has died.
You see, there was this drunk driver…
Its like, you blink and click a button and suddenly you read an email telling you that someone has passed away. You read that message over and over, and you just can't believe it. Its not REALLY the person you know.
Because, he was an incredible talent, he gave of his creative energy freely. He rendered these spectacular and original images. He was passionate about life, and discussed everything with an intensity some might call madness. He had all these ideas, and projects coming to life. So much. So much.
Yeah. Him. He's gone now. No more.
It could have been me, that time I got behind the wheel after drinking too much.
How can I forgive myself???
I'm gonna miss him.
SO MUCH.
AUTHOR'S NOTE: Known online as WEB, Beau will be greatly missed. He had a great deal to offer this world, and below are just a very FEW of the things he has done. Enjoy them, and remember…don't take this life for granted. If there is something you want to do, DO IT NOW…don't wait.
WEB'S WORK:
First page of Cemetary Girl
Burning Times at C3
Incredible Western Crow Concept!!
Very Emotional Piece
I could post much much more...and who knows what incredible work WEB would have gone on to create? I can't believe he is truly gone. I hope beyond hope that I'm able to see you when I leave this world...not sure what's out there after death but if there is ANY justice, you are kicking back and looking down at all us poor bastards from somewhere much better.
Tribute to WEB |
Viewing entries 1 - 5 of 32 entries
|
Posted On: September 01, 2002 08:00:05 PM
Name: Just someone who ran across the site... How did you know WEB?: I didn't. Words to WEB:: Just when you think you have a grip on things, you find someone else who was wonderful taken away by a careless, selfish individual...and it makes you angry...
i'm sorry this happened, i wish i could make it better for everyone involved. |
Posted On: August 29, 2002 06:35:45 PM
Name: Black Arachnia Email: gmskinner@panam.edu How did you know WEB?: I know him only through what i have read on this sight. But i too know the pain of loss. Even though I never met him. I am still saddened by his death. Words to WEB:: I'm sorry I never met you. |
Posted On: August 04, 2002 10:47:45 PM
Name: Katie Daniel Email: eibhy@yahoo.com How did you know WEB?: I met Beau in 1995 at an SCA event. And I got to know him pretty well from that date onwards... He was a great man, and a great friend. Words to WEB:: I still miss you, Beau. Hope you've found a better world up there and you're looking down on all of us, smiling. |
Posted On: June 23, 2002 01:49:19 AM
Name: Chris Email: darkdraven3@yahoo.com How did you know WEB?: I really didn't know him. Just some of his work. Words to WEB:: It really sucks that you had to go. Never will we know the full vastness of your mind. Something we all would have loved to see. |
Posted On: June 03, 2002 10:13:03 PM
Name: Dream Dancer Email: dark_angel592002@yahoo.ca How did you know WEB?: i didn't Words to WEB:: Rest in peace dude. hope ur killer
goes 2 http://www.muddaf***inhell.ca
Peace out
Dream. |
|
FICTION and POETRY
WEB was not only a tremendous artist, his talent with words is equally impressive. In this section you can explore his fictional works and poetry.
:::FICTION:::
Man Who Laughs (at CFFA)
Nevermore (at CFFA)
Man Who
Laughs
by W.E.
Burton (weburton@yahoo.com)
FORWARD: THE CEMETERY GIRL
"I like my crow, she whispers secrets in my ear." -McMurtry-
My name is Romie. Romie the clown, bonified dead girl.
That's right. You heard correctly, dead. Deceased. Maggot
munchies. Taking the twenty-four hour dirt nap, as Victor
would have said.
I was nine years old when I first met the crow. That was
fifteen years before Loki, and Mangus. Fifteen years before
my sweet friend crawled from the warm euphoria of heaven
it's self, and followed the crow to Earth. He did it for
my sake, even though it would bring him no comfort what
so ever.
Memories are cheap here. And the memory of that winter
when I was nine, come wafting back to me like the scent
of your first sweethearts perfume.
I spent the winter holidays with my cousins that year.
They were a year or so older than me. My dad's nieces,
little blonde girls, that bared as little resemblance
to me in philosophy as they did in appearance.
That winter they were caught in the grip of a boy hysteria,
that wouldn't inflict me until I was fourteen, and never
with such ferocity.
My dad encouraged me to play with them, and I tried. They,
mostly ignored me, however. I would plod along behind
them as they discussed which of this months teen idols
was the cutest. Who had the prettiest hair, which one
they would marry when they were eighteen and he was thirty-five.
I had no opinion, so I kept to my self, preferring to
become lost in my own thoughts, my little girl hopes and
dreams.
That day our wanderings took us near an old cemetery.
A rundown little place, full of forgotten lives. It put
me in mind of a Halloween cardboard cut out, a gnarled
tree in the background, a friendly ghost peaking out from
behind a leaning tombstone as if to say, "Just us ghosts
here, don't mind us."
I was instantly fascinated. I left my cousins to there
discussions and explored the little graveyard. I looked
at nearly every grave marker, and found nothing particularly
interesting. I was about to leave when I noticed a young
woman sitting beneath a tree just outside the cemetery
gate.
She was beautiful, but strange. Her skin was the color
of ash, and I thought I could see ice crystals forming
in her dred locks.
She had a little smile painted in black over her mouth,
and a single tear drop, also in black, was painted just
beneath one eye.
The girl was oddly dressed for winter, in a tank top and
jeans. Her feet were as bare as your bottom when the doctor
gave you that first swat. The crow pecked randomly at
the frozen ground between her feet.
I watched her for a little while, but she didn't seem
to notice me. She had a faraway look in her eyes. Every
once in a while she would smile to herself, as if catching
one of those cheap memories as it floated listlessly by.
"Are you ok miss?" I asked to draw her attention.
She snapped toward me, startled out of her reverie. She
smiled when she saw me.
"I am now, I think." Said the cemetery girl.
"What are you doing in the cemetery?" I asked.
"I'm waiting for someone." she replied a little wistfully.
That answer satisfied me, and I looked at her feet again.
They didn't appear red or swollen like feet should be
if they were exposed to the winter elements.
"What happened to your shoes?" I asked staring at her
toes.
She looked at her feet also, and shrugged.
"I didn't come with any I guess."
You came with pants, I thought, but didn't mention it.
I was curious about the crow.
"Is that your bird?" I inquired of my odd new acquaintance.
The crow cawed in reply, and flew up into the branches
of the tree.
"Well, she doesn�t belong to me. She's just my friend
I guess." she answered.
Wow. A crow for a friend. I smiled at the thought.
"What's her name?" I asked.
"I dunno. I call her Corby. She doesn�t seem to mind that."
Said the strange girl.
I frowned. Corby wasn't a good name for a crow, especially
a girl crow.
The cemetery girl stood and stretched. I could hear her
bare feet crunching the frozen ground beneath them.
"You sure ask a lot of questions." she observed.
"My dad says I'm very inquisitive." I said, realizing
it was my first non question statement.
"Well he's right about that." she smiled. "But that's
a good quality for a girl. It proves you're willing to
learn."
We were both silent for a moment. That faraway look returned
to the cemetery girls face, and I contemplated the ground
between my Keds.
"What are you doing in the cemetery?" she asked me.
"Just looking around." I shrugged.
"You aren't here by your self are you?." she asked with
a twinge of concern.
"Naw" I said. I gestured vaguely in the direction my cousins
had wandered. "My cousins are back there somewhere."
I heard my cousins calling for me then. I had disappeared
and they were looking for me. They knew I existed after
all.
I turned toward my cousins' little girl voices, and saw
them just entering the cemetery. When I turned back to
the cemetery girl, she was gone.
I stood there looking at the spot she had recently vacated
until my cousins joined me.
We walked home, and I didn't mention the girl with the
crow.
I grew up and forgot about the cemetery girl for the remainder
of my short life.
But the image of Victor walking down a deserted road in
that oversized rain coat he seemed to come equipped with,
brought it back to me after death.
His ashen face painted with black marks not that dissimilar
to the girl's. A ghastly grin slashed into his face by
a psychotic's knife, the crow perched on his shoulder.
Memories are cheap here, as I have said. Cheap because
they're all you have.
I VICTOR
"I wish you all the love in the world, but most of
all, I wish it from myself." -McVee-
I believe love comes in many forms. No one any more or
less important than the last. I wish I could have convinced
Victor of that. I loved him as much, in some ways more,
than my fianc�e. But romantic love carries with it a strange,
not unpleasant, desire.
It drives some people to murder, others to sacrifice.
Victor held that kind of love for me, and in a way, it
led him to both. To Victor, it was the only love.
In medieval literature, it's called courtly love. A love,
though unattainable, that instills in it's sufferers,
a fanatic devotion. Many a knight died for a woman they
knew they could never have.
In this way Victor died for me. My stygian knight, who
stepped out of the darkness of death to avenge the wrongs
done to me, because he couldn't do it in the light of
life.
I met Victor when I was nineteen. The year I started college.
He seemed to be the brooding type. Tall, shaven headed,
ice blue eyes looking back at you from his, solemn, sensitive,
face.
He was more kind, and more gentle, than any one I have
ever known. It hurts me to think of how Loki and Mangus,
killed that in him.
From the first he bore a fierce loyalty to me. A loyalty
I have often wondered if I deserved.
There was an attraction. That much is certain. But like
I have said, there is that pleasant desire that comes
with romantic love, (the real thing, not the sexual kind),
and I loved someone else. That's what hurt Victor more
than anything else. I didn't share that pleasant desire
with him.
Victor and I died the night I told him I was getting married.
I guess I never told him really, he figured it out himself.
My fianc�e, Craig, had proposed a month earlier. We had
just graduated from college and he couldn't afford a ring.
But the intention was there, and that's what is important.
I put off telling Victor because I knew what it would
do to him. I was dating Craig, though casually, when Victor
and I met, so he was comfortable with the idea of me being
with someone. But engagement was a different story all
together.
Victor harbored a tiny hope that I would forget about
Craig one day, and share my pleasant desire with him.
The news of my engagement would crush that little hope,
and Victor himself most likely.
When I became engaged, I was tending bar at a night club.
Victor would come in once a week like clock work, to visit
me on my dinner break. I didn't mind. I enjoyed it actually.
I didn't get to see him much at the time because I spent
most of my time with Craig, and seeing us together was
uncomfortable for Victor.
He came in that night looking a little forlorned. He let
go only reluctantly when I hugged him.
"Sheesh, you look so sad." I observed.
"I guess I am. A little." he said.
"What's wrong?" I asked, already knowing the answer.
"I'll tell you later, maybe." he said and brushed the
hair away from my face. He did that sometimes. It was
an affectionate gesture I was never very comfortable with.
I'm not sure why. It made me feel a little guilty I guess.
I was beginning to think it wasn't the time for my news.
But I had put it off to long as it was, and judging by
how he was acting, he knew already.
"I have something to tell you." I said.
"You're getting married huh?" said Victor, staring into
his drink.
I smiled. "How did you know."
"I'm psychic remember." he said looking at me. The sadness
leaving his face for a moment.
"Sure." I said grinning.
"It wasn't that hard to figure out Romie." he said.
"You've been walking on egg shells around me for a month.
I figured something was up."
Most likely one of our mutual friends had told him, even
though I had asked them not to. He was protecting whoever
it was. That was so like him.
"What else could you be so reluctant to tell me." He said
sipping his drink. "Considering my sick obsession."
"The sick obsession" was how Victor chose to refer to
his love for me, when he chose to talk about it at all.
He didn't very often, because he thought it would make
me uncomfortable.
"I don't want to give you the creeps." he would say. It
didn't give me the creeps at all. I was grateful for his
affection. It made me feel wanted. And that was something
I rarely felt.
"It isn't sick." I told him that night. I avoided his
eyes and began to play with a napkin. "Just unusual."
"Unusually sick." He said and smiled at me.
I smiled back. It was a joke so I didn't argue.
We were silent for a moment. He contemplated his drink.
I contemplated my rapidly disintegrating napkin.
The silence was broken when I was hit in the back of the
head with an ice cube. I grabbed my head and turned to
see who threw it.
Loki. If you are female, and have tended bar, you know
Loki. Not him specifically, but the regular customers
like him. He was a blonde, redneck, arrogant asshole.
The worlds perfect asshole, who can't keep his hands off
you, and who takes it as a personal affront that you don't
want to jump into the sac with him.
I had rejected the greasy slime I know not how many times.
His advances became increasingly disgusting with each
fresh attempt. I often wondered if he actually thought
turning up the lewdness, would soften my resolve.
Why certainly Loki. I would love for you to ass fuck me.
And you know why? Because you were polite enough to offer.
There he sat. Bigger'n life. His limp blond hair hanging
over his forehead in lumps. And his loyal loser friends
at his sides, more than happy to applaud his abhorable
behavior.
Flaco. The fat yes man. They called him Flaco (border
Spanish for skinny) because he was anything but skinny.
And he never got the joke. The back of his neck looked
like pack of bratwurst. Pale and greasy. If you slapped
Flaco across your favorite silk shirt you'd have to throw
it out. Even the stain fighting power of Ultra Tide would
have trouble with that one. All in all a disgusting individual,
he had no personality of his own.
His every thought and opinion dictated by whoever he happened
to be hanging with at the time. He unfortunately opted
to share company with the likes of Loki.
And Loki's right hand. Mangos. Mangus was hopelessly infatuated
with himself, and he expected you to be as well. Probably
because most women he knew were, in one way or another.
He was good looking, I admit that.
He was constantly fussing with his brown hair, which he
wore to his waist. His features were chiseled, but there
seemed to be a coldness lurking behind his Grey eyes.
Many women, I'm sure, would find it attractive. Exciting,
a little dangerous. I found it threatening.
Scary almost. I couldn't stand to have him look at me.
Victor stood up and faced Loki. He looked angry, an emotion
I had rarely seen in him.
"What the fuck was that?" He said, glaring at Loki.
"That was ice, to keep the bitch cold." said Loki.
Flaco burst into laughter. A sickening "hork hork" sound,
that shook his belly, making it roll and sway.
"Keep the bitch cold." he repeated between throws of hilarity.
Mangus stood up, glaring at Victor with his cold eyes.
Loki waved him down and stood up himself, though unsteadily.
Loki was drunk.
"Who do you think you're talkin to Que. ball." He got
in Victor's face.
I called for the bouncers, and they came at an uncomfortably
slow pace.
"I think I'm talking to a drunk red neck sack of shit."
Victor said. "I'm right aren't I." he added almost innocently.
Loki took a swing at him. Victor side stepped and gave
him a little push. Loki dropped, almost slowly, to a sitting
position on the floor.
"Sit down asshole. Clear your head." Victor told him.
By then the bouncers had come. They escorted Loki and
his minions out of the club. And in a few minutes the
encounter was mostly forgot.
I asked Victor to stay for the rest of the shift so we
could talk some more, and an hour or two later we left
the club together.
II VAINITY
"Freezing feeling, breath in-breath in, I'm comin back
again." -Sully & Robbie-
Cheap memories, like cheap stereo equipment, have a tendency
to break, if you don't care enough to send the warranty
in. We tend to forget things we don't care to remember,
even here. I thank god for that.
I've forgotten, or blocked out, the most dreadful things
that happened after Victor and I left the club that night.
What Mangus did to me with his knife, and what Loki did
with his body, I have forgotten. Thank god. I learned
those facts second hand, as I watched Victor go about
his grisly mission.
I remember what Mangus did to Victor, unfortunately. They
must have ambushed us. I recall leaving the club, talking
to Victor.
The next thing I remember seeing is Victor crawling along
the ground toward me. His stomach bleeding, leaving a
trail of blood, from where he initially fell. Mangus went
to him with that ungodly knife.
"What's the matter Que. ball? You don't look happy." He
told my friend, before he slashed the corners of his mouth
into that sick grin. Victor looked as if he was laughing.
Ha! I've been gutted, and they're doing, god knows what
horrible things to my friend. What could be funnier?
"That's better now isn't it." Mangos said, and left my
line of sight. I could hear Loki laughing above me. I
half expected to hear that ugly "hork hork" sound of Flaco's
laughter, but I heard nothing from him, even though I
knew he was there.
And then I saw the crow. It came from no where, and landed
in front of Victor, blocking me from his line of sight.
It fidgeted for a moment, ruffling it's feathers. Then
I heard it whisper.
"Don't look Victor." It said in a soft, comforting voice.
"It won't help her if you look."
But he did look. And I could see the pain, his and my
own, in those unusual eyes. Tears welled in his eyes and
poured down his cheeks, but he made no sound. That grotesque
side show grin, mocking his true emotions.
And there my cheap memory broke again. The next thing
I remember is lying there next to Victor. He had crawled
to me. I could hear Loki, Mangus and Flaco arguing behind
us. The crow was gone.
"Victor I'm cold." I said. But I don't remember feeling
it. He crawled closer to me and put his arms around me.
A vain attempt to keep me warm, as the heat of life slowly
ebbed from his own body.
"I'm sorry Victor." I said, but he didn't answer. He was
already gone.
Craig and I had our problems. We were on again off again
for years. The off again times were delightful for Victor.
He would try to be concerned and understanding. But I
know he was secretly pleased. I didn't fault him for that.
I'm sure, if our positions were reversed, I would do the
same. That pleasant desire again.
One of the off again times came around Halloween of our
sophomore year in college. Victor asked me to go to a
party with him, and I accepted.
I went with Victor mostly because I wanted to, but partly
to make Craig jealous, I'm ashamed to say.
It's one of those times I questioned if I was deserving
of Victor's loyalty. I used him. I figured if he knew
that, he would have been destroyed. I confessed to him
one day when I was feeling guilty.
"I know." he said, smiling at me without the slightest
anger in his face.
"You're psychic right." I said feeling ashamed.
"Yeah." he said. "It doesn�t matter Romie. I was just
happy you were there with me."
He was so forgiving. Forgiving of anything, unless it
caused me discomfort.
We went to the Halloween party as clowns. I was the sad
clown, he was the happy clown. Victor appreciated the
irony in that. He considered me to be perpetually happy,
himself to be perpetually sad.
Victor painted our faces. For me, a bright red frown over
my mouth, little blue tear drops beneath each eye, and
a vast red polka dot on my chin. Romie the clown. Tearful
prankster, friend to all.
For him, a bright red smile, red spots on each cheek,
and a matching red polka dot.
He must have remembered that. He filled out the warranty
for that cheap memory. When he appeared on that deserted
rural road, in his inexplicable, over sized, rain coat,
his face was painted in a grim imitation of my Romie the
clown make up.
The tears were in black, and the polka dot on the chin
as well. The frown was now a smile, the scars left by
Mangus' knife.
I can't tell you why I there. Just that I was. I tried
to make him see me, but he couldn't, so I just followed
him. He walked down the middle of that road, the crow
flying out infront of him, a determined expression on
his face.
We finally came to a house. A cheap two story job. There
was a dismantled thunderbird on blocks in the yard, and
car parts scattered willy nilly about the place.
Victor stopped, looking at the house. The crow flew to
the roof and looked down at Victor. Victor appeared reluctant.
"Second thoughts?" whispered the crow.
"No. But I'm scared." Said Victor.
"Fear is food for courage Victor." quoth the crow.
Victor spent a moment contemplating his boots, (which
he came with by the way). "I don't know if I can."
"You can." said the crow. "Remember, and you can."
Victor gathered his courage and mounted the short steps
to the front of the house. He pushed the door open and
entered, followed by the crow, and myself.
The house was dark inside, and the smell of motor oil
seemed to saturate the place. The crow flew out ahead
of us, up the stairs. victor followed at a slow pace.
I could hear Mangus when we reached the top of the stairs.
He was making primal sounds, the kind that could only
mean one thing. Mangus was fornicating. The sounds made
by his partner were muffled as if her face was buried
in a pillow.
"Yeah..." I heard Mangus say. "That's what you want."
Victor smirked and shook his head from left to right.
He heard it too.
I followed Victor to the door from whence Mangus' could
be heard. He pushed the door open a little ways, and the
crow flew in. Mangus and his companion didn't seem to
notice. Mangus' back was to us, and as I thought, his
chubby partners face was in the pillow.
"Knock knock." Victor said loudly.
Mangus jumped and turned toward the door. "Who's there?"
he shouted. The girl squirmed.
Victor laughed, that sweet laugh I knew so well.
Mangus jumped out of the bed fumbling for a pistol that
was on the knight stand. The girl scrambled to cover herself.
When he had the pistol he pointed it at Victor who had
stepped into the room.
"I'm the man who laughs." Victor said.
"You don't fuckin say." was Mangus' charming reply.
"Lose the girl Mangus, so we can talk." said Victor.
"Fuck you!" Mangus said, and fired the pistol.
The chubby girl screamed and left the room wrapped in
a sheet. The bullet caught Victor in the upper thigh.
A wide spot of blood was beginning to spread out from
the wound. Victor didn't seem to notice. He watched the
girl run from the room.
"I thought you could do better than that, Mangus." Victor
said when he turned back to the man with the gun.
"Holy shit..." said Mangus.
"She's kinda chunky..." Victor said stepping a little
closer. "...for a world class stud such as yourself. Don't
you think?"
Mangus fired the pistol again, this time catching Victor
directly in the guts. Victor stepped forward and slapped
the pistol out of Mangus' hand. He grabbed Mangus by the
throat. The crow began to caw, and flap it's wings. Mangus
didn't notice, though the noise was distracting.
"Guns don't make you invincible." Victor said, glaring
into Mangus' cold eyes. "Only death can do that."
Victor shoved Mangus away. "You have something I want
Mangus."
"Oh no pal..." Mangus said reaching beneath his pillow.
"You aint gettin my fuckin corn bread."
Victor laughed a "what does that mean?" laugh.
Mangus produced his knife from beneath the pillow and
attacked Victor.
Victor tried to defend himself but he was no fighter.
Mangus stabbed him in the guts a half dozen times and
slashed his throat.
The crow continued it's protestations. Cawing, flapping,
flying from side of the room to the other. I could do
nothing, I could only watch.
Mangus finally lodged the knife in Victor's collar bone,
and Victor got in a lucky shot that sent Mangus tumbling
over the bed.
There was an expression of rage on Victors face as he
went around the bed after Mangus. He stopped suddenly,
seeming to notice the knife sticking out of his shoulder
for the first time. His expression of rage changed to
one of annoyance. He plucked the knife out, and dropped
it on the floor.
There he was. His pale face painted in dark clown make
up, a half dozen, bleeding knife wounds in his belly.
A gash as long as you credit card statement running across
his throat. And ya know what? He was still coming.
Mangus figured it out.
"Jesus H. God." he said. "It's you."
Victor grabbed him by the throat and flung him at the
opposite wall. There was an audible crunch, broken ribs
I guess. Mangus slid to the floor and immediately began
coughing foamy blood. A punctured lung maybe. The crow
cawed one last time, and fell silent pecking at something
on the floor.
Victor got down close to him. "As I was saying, you have
something I want Mangus."
"The...(cough)...war lance." Mangus said. "In the closet."
There was only one little closet in the room, with full
length mirror on the door. Victor went to it.
"I can have anyone...(hack)...I want you know." Mangus
said.
"What?" victor said opening the closet door.
"Vicki, you said...(hork)...she was chubby." Mangus continued.
Victor rolled his eyes as he rummaged through the closet.
"That's right Mangus. You're so purty."
Victor found the war lance. A little stick about four
feet long, topped with a crude stone spear head. Tied
to the stick, were a bakers dozen human scalps.
"Jesus." Victor said under his breath. He brought the
lance to Mangus. "Which one is it Mangus."
Mangus plucked one scalp off the lance and handed it to
Victor. He took it and tensed up. Staggering back a couple
of steps. He closed his eyes tightly. When he opened them,
tears flooded his face.
"Who are they Mangus?" Victor asked.
"I don't know man." Mangus said. "Runaways, hookers some
of them."
Victor stared down at Mangus. Then seeming to suppress
a gag he turned away. He saw himself in Mangus' mirror,
that look of rage returning. He went to the mirror and
smashed it with his fist, returning to Mangus with a long
shard.
"Why?" he asked.
"I liked their hair." Mangus said.
"Pretty, like yours, right Mangus?" said Victor venomously.
"What the fuck man...(cough)...they're human waste. No
body fuckin cares."
"You did that to my friend, Mangus." Victor said quietly.
"I fuckin care."
"She...had it coming." said Mangus with a cough. "You
and her made a fool of Loki."
Victor stared at him, the rage and hatred leaving his
face. Now he just looked tired.
"One more thing before you go Mangus." he said softly.
"Where am I going?" Mangus asked.
Victor didn't answer. "Where did you put her Mangus?"
he said.
"Is she with the others from the lance?"
"No man. Flaco knew a place." Mangus said. "He and Loki
took her...I don't know where."
Victor leaned in to him with a sigh. "I'll have to talk
to Flaco then." He took a fist full of Mangus' hair. "This
is going to hurt you more than it hurts me." he said.
I had to turn away when he scalped Mangus with the mirror
shard. The crow began flapping and screeching again as
Mangus screamed.
When Mangus fell quiet, Victor dropped the bloody scrap
of flesh and hair into it's owners lap and left. The crow
came to land on his shoulder, and I followed them down
the stairs.
What he had done shocked me. I understood it, but I was
still shocked. The Victor I knew in life would have been
sickened to even hear of such a thing.
The chubby girl had left the house naked apparently. She
left the sheet she was wearing on the door step. Victor
found it and began ripping it into strips. He sat down
on the floor and began binding his still bleeding wounds
with the ribbons of cloth.
I sat down next to him and watched him do it. I sensed
regret in his poor disfigured face. Regret for what he
had done to Mangus? Regret for what Mangus had forced
him to do? The crow fidgeted nervously on his shoulder."I
told you, you could do it." It said finally.
"Leave me alone, ok." Victor said.
The crow seemed to shrug and flew off upstairs, to peck
at Mangus I imagined.
As I sat there with Victor, he bagan to weep. I wept with
him.
III YORICK
as poor Yorick, I knew him well Horatio." -Shakespeare-
Top five advantages to being a ghost girl, in no particular
order.
1) Walls, fences, hedges, any kind of physical barrier
present no obstacle what so ever. Remember when Casper
used to float through walls?....there you go.
2) No pain, not the physical kind anyway. It's pretty
hard to hurt someone who is already dead. Not to mention
someone who can walk through walls.
3) You don't have to shave your legs. Nuff said.
4) No taxes.
5) You can become part of someone. See what they see,
feel what they feel, think what they are thinking, share
dreams with them. Nothing is more helpful if you are trying
to understand a person.
I discovered number five by accident. After Victor finished
with Mangus, and bandaged himself with the strips he made
from the sheet Mangus' portly girlfriend had left, he
laid down. Right there on the cold wood floor of Mangus'
loathsome house, he fell asleep.
I laid down with him. I cuddled up to him as I had done
a few times before, when we were watching television on
his couch, before Craig and I became exclusive. I imagined
it would have been some small comfort to him. I was hurting
for my sweet friend.
Why had he come here? In life he never entertained thoughts
of revenge. I didn't think that was it, I couldn't imagine
murdering our murderers would relieve any pain at all
for him.
I tried to touch his face, but my hand passed through
him as easily as it would a wall. I caught in my mind
a brief disjointed swatch of his dream.
Victor and I had a mutual friend. Misha was her name.
I knew her a while before she and Victor met. The two
of them became fast friends after I introduced them.
I had entertained a vague hope that she and Victor would
hit it off and become more than friends.
Not that I wanted to get him off my back you understand,
but it would have been nice to see him happy.
It was a vain hope of course. Victor reserved that pleasant
desire for me, no one else would do for him. I wonder
now how long it would have taken for him to get over me,
had Loki and Mangus given him the chance.
Misha met a nice guy named Adam, and after a short courtship,
they became engaged. I was a bridesmaid, and Victor attended
the wedding, though reluctantly, as a friendly gesture
for Misha.
I remember seeing Victor during the ceremony, looking
dreadfully uncomfortable. He was imagining me, I think,
standing there with Craig, professing our eternal love
for each other, and anticipating all the little joys and
discomforts our life together would bring. It must have
been rough for him.
After the ceremony, when all the other guests were mingling,
or dancing to the horrible music provided by the band,
I spied Victor sitting alone at a table. He looked miserable.
I walked over to him.
"Hey there." I said. "What are you doing over here all
by yourself?"
"Just being anonymous I guess." he said.
"Do you want me to go away." I asked.
"No," he smiled. "I'm glad you came over."
I sat down next to him. He smiled at me and brushed the
hair away from my eyes in that uncomfortable, affectionate
way of his. He shook his head from left to right.
"What?" I asked.
"Nothing," he said. "You would just think I was hitting
on you."
"That's ok." I said.
"It's ok if I hit on you?" he said with mock excitement.
"I guess so," I answered. "Craig isn't here." I smiled
at him.
"Hey baby," he said in an Italian grease ball voice. "You
so hot I could cook a steak over you."
We laughed at that, and talked for a moment, about how
pretty the wedding was, compared to the awful band.
"Speaking of the band. Why haven�t you asked me to dance?"
I inquired.
"Oh, I don't think you want to dance with me Romie." he
aid. "I don't know how."
I stood up and offered him my hand. "That's ok. I'll teach
you."
He took my hand reluctantly, and I led him to the dance
floor. It was a slow song, and we danced close for a moment.
He looked so happy. I smiled at him and rested my head
on his chest, content to let him enjoy the moment.
This is what he was dreaming of. I saw us there on the
dance floor, only now we were alone. No wedding guests,
no bride, no groom, no family, only us.
I watched us dance for a few moments, before I became
aware of another presence, something, sinister, and unwelcome.
Then it showed itself. A jester dressed in a black and
white party colored coat hardy, a fleshless face staring
out of a twin pointed cowl. It stepped out of no where
and seized me by the hair, producing Mangus' knife.
It scalped me, bowing with a flourish, and waving with
my scalp as if it were his hat.
My body vanished, and Victor dropped to his knees, screaming
a silent scream. The jester marched off, highstepping
like the drum major in some macabre parade. It twirled
my scalp above it's head.
"Get a move on worm food." it said, the words pouring
from it's mouth, slick and viscous, like blood from an
open wrist. "This vacation doesn�t last forever."
Victor woke with a start, breaking our momentary bond.
He drug himself to his feet, and the crow joined him as
if on Que. Victor left the house. I followed him into
the cold of the night, cold that neither of us could feel.
APATHY
oever hunts monsters, should see to it that, in the
process he dose not become a monster." -Eric-
I had known Flaco since highschool. We rarely spoke. He
chose to associate with people I didn't care for. What's
sad is that those people didn't seem to like him at all.
They would make fun of him behind his back, and play subtle
jokes on him that he never seemed to get.
Like his unfortunate nick name. I have wondered a few
times if I should have made him aware of the veiled indignities
his so called friends wrought upon him.
But the truth is I didn't like him much, and I was content
to let him be made a fool of. I'm sorry for that now I
think. Could a little genuine encouragement and friendship
have made him a better person? I think it could have,
and I regret my treatment of him. I think now it was just
as cruel, as the treatment given to him by the people
he did call friends.
His pride and joy, his near reason for, living was an
elaborately cared for pick up truck. The make and model
I have chosen to forget. He had put a decal in the back
window that read: Flaco's Bad Boy Toy. Flaco's bad boy
small penis extenuation, Victor called it once.
He was driving his bad boy small penis extenuation when
victor and I caught up to him.
We were walking down the road we started on, away from
Mangus' house, when Victor spied Flaco in his beloved
truck. He was driving toward Mangus' house, a set expression
on his face.
Victor stopped and extended his hand, thumb out, in the
direction Flaco was driving. Hey mister. Can I get a ride?
Flaco drove by without looking at Victor, but a few yards
down the road he screeched to a stop. He turned and looked
over his shoulder at Victor, who walked at a leisurely
pace toward the vehicle.
I could see the expression of horror on his face. He knew
Victor on sight. It was as if Flaco had been expecting
him. He turned back toward to the road ahead, remaining
parked for a moment as if considering what he should do
next. Then he panicked, and floured it. Dirt and gravel
spit out from beneath the tires, as he made a wild U-turn
back at Victor. I'll run the creeper over, that's what
I'll do.
Victor stood his ground as the truck sped toward him,
leaping away only at the last second. Flaco's truck smashed
head on into a massive tree at the side of the road.
Victor approached the truck casually. He leaned on the
driver side door, looking in at Flaco, who was unconscious.
After a moment he began to stir, coming to only slowly.
"Hi Flaco." Victor said with a smile. Flaco's eyes widened
when he saw Victor. He began to whimper and squirm, in
a vain attempt to escape. His legs were pinned beneath
the crumpled dash.
"You smashed your truck up pretty bad Flaco." Victor said
giving it a look over.
"Oh Jesus." said Flaco. "I dreamed of you. You and that
fucking bird."
"Really?" Victor said raising his eyes in mock supprise.
"I was gonna make it right...." Flaco continued.
Victor's expression hardened. "What does that mean Flaco?"
he said.
"I was gonna waste Mangus..." Flaco said, without a trace
of fear. "an....and Loki" he continued, now terrified.
You should be more afraid of Mangus I thought, the image
of that ghastly trophy stick shoving it's way into my
mind.
"How thoughtful of you Flaco." said Victor.
A fire had started in the front end of the truck. I could
smell gas I thought. Victor noticed the fire.
"Where is she Flaco? Where did you put her?"
"I didn't want to....you have to understand that." Flaco
said, as the fire began to make it's way up toward the
cab of the truck.
"Yeah sure." Victor said. "Where?"
"Otter creek." Flaco answered. "That old dam...no one
would ever even look there."
"Cool." Victor said turning away.
"Wait, you aren't just going to leave me here?" said Flaco
beginning to panic.
Victor turned back to him. "That's right Flaco. You let
them hurt her, I let you die. It's called dramatic Irony.
You should have paid attention in class."
"Jesus Victor. I didn't want her to get hurt." Flaco said.
"I liked Romie....she was always nice to me."
I cringed. If he only knew.
"I was so scared....I didn't know what to do." continued
Flaco.
Victor held his hand out to Flaco palm up, a "gimme gimme"
gesture. "I sell my pity for a dime." he said.
"I'm sorry." Flaco said, his eyes beginning to fill with
tears.
"Yeah." Victor said, and began to walk away.
I could smell, leather, plastic and Flaco's legs burning,
as the fire became a roaring inferno.
"I was so scared." Flaco said, to himself this time. "I
was so scared."
My heart began to break for Flaco.
Top five disadvantages to being a ghost girl. In no particular
order.
1) You can't touch anything. Whatever it is that allows
you to walk through walls, prevents you from touching
anything, and anything from touching you. That means no
affectionate brushing of the hair, no little kisses, no
giving in to that pleasant desire. It means I couldn't
help Flaco. Only Victor could do that now.
2) No one can hear you. Which means I couldn't ask Victor
to help.
3) You're dead. Duh.
4) Regret. Endless regret, about things you could or should
have done differently during your life. The regret I felt
for mistreating Flaco, for instance. Regret to the point
of distraction.
5) No one can see you.
Unless you try really hard. I fought my condition. I began
to push my way through that unseen mist of death that
held me back from the world of the living. God how I wished
for a crow of my own to carry me there.
I stood in front of Victor, waving my arms and jumping
up and down. He didn't see me. He just walked along, head
down. Eyes filling with cold tears. Then he stopped.
Victor looked up. His eyes widened. He could see me. I
stopped. I could se myself in his strange eyes. Romie
the clown. Painted face, red , to cute for words, overalls
with the bright yellow smiley face on the bib.
He could see me, but he couldn't hear me, so I pantomimed.
I pointed at Flaco, and wiped away imaginary tears. He
looked back over his shoulder. Flaco was silent, but still
struggling to free himself from the burning vehicle.
Victor turned back to me, but I was gone from his mirror
like eyes. He hesitated for a moment, then turned at a
run to Flaco. He ripped the door off of the truck, flinging
it behind him. He reached into the flames that were raging
just beneath the dash board, and pried it up, freeing
Flaco's pitiful legs.
He ripped the seat belt from around Flaco, and lifted
him up carrying him to the side of the road, as the truck
continued to burn. I could see the flesh of Victor's hands
falling off in unspeakable slabs. Burned to the core,
but not broken. Flaco looked up at him. "I'm sorry Victor.
God, please believe me."
Victor looked down at him, feeling Flaco's burns but not
his own. "I believe you Charles." he said. He laid Charles,
Flaco to his so called friends, gently down. "I'm sorry
too. Forgive me."
Charles nodded. Victor stood up. "I'll get help for you."
Victor ran off seeking help. I stayed with Charles. Tried
to comfort him, though I knew he couldn't see or hear
me. I touched him. Or tried to. My hand passing through
him as easily as yours would through still water. I could
feel his pain. And it did me good I think. I heard his
thoughts. He was thinking of Mangus, and Loki, and all
his other waste of flesh friends throughout the years.
"He called me Charles." Flaco thought. The emotions connected
to the cruel nickname he had embraced, came flooding to
me. Sadness, self loathing, that sick feeling that comes
with knowing you aren't accepted. If I like the name,
maybe they will like me.
He knew. He knew what the name meant. I cursed myself.
"I'm sorry too Charles." I said, and began to cry my ghost
tears.
Never judge, my dad used to tell me. But if you must judge
a man, judge him by what he becomes, not what he was in
the past. The meaning of that lesson finally came home
to me. And another lesson, one born of my own emotions.
Whatever the game is you are playing, mercy is never against
the rules. Even if it costs you that celebratory pizza
and beer at the end.
After a few moments I could hear the sound of ambulance
sirens. I left Charles when the medics arrived, and rejoined
Victor and the crow. He returned to Mangus' house, and
used the remains of Vicki's sheet to bandage his scorched
hands. He didn't take a nap this time. He just left when
he finished, a thoughtful expression on his face. He left
Mangus' house and paid a visit to my former fianc�e.
V CRAIG
"Dreams of loneliness, like a heart beat drive you
mad. In the stillness of remembering what you had and
what you lost." -Nicks-
Victor and Craig were polar opposites. I think that gave
Victor some distress during our brief friendship. To Victor,
Craig embodied everything he could never be. Victor was
self conscious, wracked with insecurity.
Craig was confident, self assured. Craig was athletic,
active. Victor was a couch potato, preferring to avoid
exercise when ever possible. I think he saw those qualities
of Craig's as the qualities I wanted. That wasn't the
truth really.
I never thought about what qualities I wanted. I can't
really say why I fell for Craig instead of Victor. I don't
think we have control over that pleasant desire. It bites
us where it bites us. Victor could quote you chapter and
verse about the biting habits of the southwestern pleasant
desire.
The truth of the matter was that Victor could have been
those things if he had given himself the chance. And Victor
was many things Craig could never have been. Craig had
a tendency to be thoughtless. Victor was ever thoughtful.
Victor was poetic, romantic, (at times anyway). Craig
wouldn't know romance if it was a dead fish, and you smacked
him across the face with it.
I met Craig the summer after I graduated from high school.
The summer before I met Victor. Craig was quiet, but not
the sad quiet that afflicted Victor, more mysterious quiet.
He hid his handsome face behind a massive red goatee.
I tried, I don't know how many times, to get him to shave
it, but he wouldn't hear of it. What most impressed me
at first were his eyes. They weren't as remarkable as
Victors reflective blue ones, but interesting just the
same. Beautiful, green and intelligent.
A few months before he asked me to marry him, Craig and
I moved in together. It was a little rental house, not
that dissimilar to the one we found Mangus in, painted
a gaudy pink. We shared it with another couple, and it
was a nice little home, as long as it lasted. Victor went
there to visit Craig.
There is a big tree in the back yard, right across from
the upstairs bedroom Craig and I shared. Victor climbed
the tree, and sat in the branches, looking into the bedroom.
He didn't say or do anything. He just sat there, looking
thoughtful and sad. After a few moments, he climbed down
and laid beneath the tree. He fell asleep I guess, like
he did at Mangus' house, but I didn't join him this time.
I went into the house to see Craig.
Ghost tears are funny things. They aren't tears in the
conventional sense. I mean, you don't have a body, so
you can't really cry. But the emotions are there, your
face feels wet, and your eyes burn as if you really had
eyes. I think we become so used to having a body in life
that we make one for ourselves in our minds, after we
die. If we aren't lucky enough to skip purgatory all together,
and go strait to heaven like Victor did.
I cried my ghost tears when I saw Craig. He was sitting
there at his desk, in the happy little room where we spent
our too few moments together, crying tears of his own.
I went to him and sat on the floor next to him, or floated
slightly above it anyway.
"Hey you." I said, though he couldn't hear me. "I know
you can't hear me, but I want you to know I still love
you."
He only stared at something on the desk, and wiped the
wet from his face.
"It isn't so bad here. Nothing hurts anymore." I lied,
my ghost voice cracking a little. "I don't want you to
worry about me."
I was silent a moment, not knowing exactly what to say.
Craig stood up and walked to the bed. He laid down on
it and looked at the ceiling. I stood and looked at what
was on his desk. A news paper clipping. A short article
about Victor and I, with a picture of him looking happy
for once, and one of myself before I cut my hair short.
"LOCAL PAIR STILL MISSING AFTER ONE YEAR"
the headline read. "POLICE SUSPECT FOUL PLAY"
I went to Craig, and laid down with him, floating just
above the bed. "I miss you buddy." I told him through
my ghost tears. I wanted to touch him. To feel him once
more. It pained me that I couldn't. But I had to try.
I reached out, and touched him. Truly touched his face.
My hand didn�t pass through this time. His face contorted
as if he was in pain, feeling my touch and mistaking it
for an all to real memory.
"Oh Romie." he said. He rolled over and turned off the
light. I laid there with him for a while, weeping non
existent tears, and floating above the covers as he slept.
I touched him again, and shared his dreams. Dreams of
making love to me, in this bed. And I wondered if a death's
head fool, lurked somewhere in the darkness. But Yorick
never came, and the dream went on it's sweet way.
I don't know how long I laid there, however long it was,
it was to short. The crow came to the window, and pecked
at the glass. I turned to it.
"Time is short Romie." it whispered sounding sympathetic.
I nodded, and it flew away. I turned back to Craig for
a moment. "What ever happens buddy, don't stop believing."
I whispered to him. "It's all true. Sometimes it just
takes a while to get there."
I leaned over and kissed his cheek. Just a little one,
and careful not to pass into him. He smiled a little in
his sleep, and I smiled back.
When I came down stairs and rejoined Victor he was sitting
on the back porch, silent in thought.
"We've got to go now, Victor." the crow said, perched
in the branches of that big tree. Victor stood and walked
slowly away.
I looked up at the crow. A crow for a friend, I smiled
at the thought.
"Thank you." I told the crow.
"Don't thank me." It said. "Thank Victor, he knows you're
here, even if he can't see you." It ruffled it's feathers
again, and shuffled it's feet. "He wanted you to see Craig."
at that it flew away and landed on Victor's shoulder.
I smiled, spreading my arms, pretending to be flying along
with Victor, my friend, The Crow.
VI ARROGANCE
"So tear me open, make you gone, no more will you hurt
anyone." -Hetfeild-
"She had it coming." Mangus had said. "You and her made
a fool of Loki." As if that was a capital crime. In there
minds I suppose it was. But in my mind, it was Loki, who
made a fool of Loki.
Misha once talked me into taking a karate class. I advanced
pretty fast, for what good it did me. I didn't stay in
class for very long, on account of Loki.
I discovered on the first day, to my dismay, that Loki
was a star member of the class. I stuck it out for nearly
a year, thinking I could put up with Loki's lewd comments
if I was learning something that would be good for me.
I could have too, if it had just been the comments.
After a few months I was beginning to really enjoy it,
and I was pretty good at it I thought.
When I made blue belt, Loki came over to congratulate
me.
"Good work." He said shaking my hand. "You made that belt
faster than I did."
I was shocked at his graciousness. I began to think there
was something worth while under there after all. I was
wrong.
The next week, and every week after that, he cornered
me when it came time to spar, and beat the crap out of
me.
"Keeping up with your training." he said. "Can't let you
slack off now that you're advancing so quickly." Nice
excuse. He couldn't stand it that I, the cold bitch, advanced
faster than he had.
I quit the class not to long after that, and never went
back. It soured me on the whole thing. Thanks Loki, for
ruining something else I came to love.
I followed Victor and the crow to the night club I had
been working at that night a year ago. The place was packed
as usual for a Saturday night. I was shocked that no one
reacted to Victor's appearance.
Pale, bandaged and bloody, horrible scars on his face,
and a big black bird perched on his shoulder, yet no one
seemed to notice him at all.
The bouncer only looked up briefly when we came in, then
went back to hitting on a beautiful girl with pink hair
and a nose ring.
We found Loki sitting alone at the same table he had been
at that night.
"What's up Loki?" Victor said cheerfully, as he sat down
at the table. The crow, hopped off of his shoulder and
began pecking at the bowl of peanuts on the table. Loki
didn't notice the crow at all.
Loki looked up from his beer and peered at Victor through
his drunken haze. "Who the fuck are you?" Said Loki.
"I'm the enemy," Victor said. "in the enemy's now."
Loki laughed at that. I don't think he got it. Victor
laughed too, humoring him.
"Why are you sitting all alone?" Victor asked.
"Are you trying to pick me up?" asked Loki.
"No, I'm just wondering why a popular guy like yourself
would be sitting alone." Victor answered.
"Mangus was supposed to be here." Loki said, almost pouting.
"Well he better be dead then." Victor said.
Loki laughed again. And Victor laughed also. He motioned
to the waitress and told her to bring another round.
Loki slapped him on the shoulder. "You're a good guy."
he told Victor.
"I'm THE good guy." Victor said, and Loki laughed.
The waitress brought Loki's beer and he bagan to swill
it immediately.
"Say Lok, I know where there is a great party happening."
Victor said.
Loki looked up with interest. "You don't say?" he said.
"Yeah, you don't want to stay here do you? There's nothing
happening." Victor said.
"I should probably wait for Mangus." Loki said.
"Forget Mangus," said Victor. �He's human waste.�
Loki slapped the table and looked up at Victor. "You know
what? You're right. Who needs that guy anyway?"
"That's the spirit." Victor said with a smile.
Loki stood up, and Victor had to steady him or he would
have fallen on his tail bone. Loki brushed him off. I
can walk stupid. He staggered off shoving people out of
the way, hollering "Get out of my way you Moe-rans."
He led Victor out to his all to flashy sports car. Loki's
bad boy small penis compensation.
"Why don't you let me drive?" Victor said.
"What are you, the designated fucking driver?" Loki asked.
"No, I just want to get behind the wheel of this machine."
said Victor, lacking convincing enthusiasm.
Loki smiled and handed Victor the keys. They got in and
drove to the dam at Otter Creek. I followed the crow,
who went as the crow flies, (so to speak) and arrived
before them.
"There aint no one here." Loki said when he arrived and
stepped out of the car.
"We are kinda early." Said Victor.
The crow flew to his shoulder, and whispered in his ear,
something I couldn't make out. Victor reached under the
seat of the sports car, finding a huge revolver. He tucked
it into his over sized rain coat, before Loki noticed.
"What is this place anyway?" Loki asked.
"You mean you don't recognize it?" Victor said with mock
suprise.
Loki shook his head looking stupefied.
"This is where sadness breathes." Victor said leading
Loki to the edge of the dam.
A look of realization dawned on Loki�s face. �Wait a minute...�
he said.
Victor pulled the pistol out of his coat and pointed it
at Loki. "You brought her here Loki, after you were finished
with her."
Loki began to back up. "You too pal, I remember...this
is fucked up.� he said. �You shouldn�t be here.�
"On your knees Loki." said Victor waving at him with the
gun.
"Oh no..." Loki said.
"That's right, Loki, you remember. Just like you made
her do." Victor spat.
"I'll bite your dick off before I suck it." Loki said,
charming as ever.
Victor rolled his eyes. "Down!" he shouted. Loki dropped
to his knees and Victor approached him. "Now open your
mouth."
Loki did it, but reluctantly. Victor inserted the barrel
of the pistol into Loki's mouth.
"That's it." Victor said, with a disgusted expression
on his face. He began to slide the barrel in and out of
Loki's mouth. The crow squawked and flapped it's wings
as it had in Mangus' bedroom.
I began to feel ill, that unspeakable memory trying to
shove it's way into my consciousness. I fought it back
with difficulty.
"Are you ready for it?" he asked Loki who had began to
sob. "Here it comes Loki, you know you want it."
Victor pulled the trigger. The top of Loki's head blew
off in an unspeakable spray, his body flailing backwards
into the stagnant water of the dam. Victor looked down
at the corpse. "Booyah." he said without emotion.
Victor was silent for a moment. He just stared into the
water, expressionless. Suddenly face distorted with hatred
and disgust. He screamed and threw the pistol as far as
he could. He dropped to his knees and began to sob. I
went to him, I wanted to touch him, but I was reluctant
to, afraid that the memory of what Loki had done to me
would still be there, to fresh to ignore. I wept instead.
Victor laid down in the grass beside the dam, and crow
flew to him. "It's almost finished Victor. You have to
be brave." it whispered.
"I miss her." Victor said softly.
"I know you do. But she isn't for you. You knew that before
you came." It said. "Finish this my friend, and give her
peace."
Victor drug himself from where he was and waded into the
still water of the dam, deep enough to dive.
I watched the water, waiting for him to emerge, the crow
pecking the ground at my feet. Victor emerged carrying
my body wrapped in sheets.
I knew then why he had come back, not for revenge, though
that was part of it I suspect. It had been Victor's time,
it had not been mine. I was restless because I had left
things unfinished, because Craig, and I needed closure.
Victor had given up heaven, and come to Earth so I could
rest, to give me my closure and my happiness. He gave
up his place in heaven so I could have it. I wept my Zen
tears for him.
He carried my body and laid it in the back seat of Loki's
car, leaving me and the crow behind. He started the engine
and drove away.
"What will happen to him now?" I asked the crow.
"He becomes like you." it said in that voice like a whisper.
I went slowly back to town, my thoughts heavy on my sweet
friend and his sacrifice.
AFTERWARD WHO WEEPS FOR THE MAN WHO LAUGHS?
"Draggin on so lonely, are you tired baby?" -Sully-
Top five misconceptions about ghosts, according to my
observations anyway, in no particular order.
1) We can�t touch anything, but for some reason we can
walk on solid ground. This isn�t true. We sort of float
above the ground, just a fraction of an inch. Seems like
we are walking though. Another trick of that self made,
imaginary body. We are used to walking, so we go through
the motions. At least I do.
2) All ghosts can change shape at will. We can thank Hollywood
for that one. I don�t know why I appeared as Romie the
clown. It just sort of happened. I had no control over
it.
3) Ghosts aren�t aware of their condition. Uh uh. I didn�t
need a medium to tell me I was dead. Believe me, I knew.
4) Ghosts are just magnetic energy. Um...hello?
5) Once a soul �goes toward the light� it can�t revisit
Earth.
I think most of us get so caught up in the euphoria of
Heaven that we choose to forget the living world even
exists. Not me buddy. I miss Craig, and my family, so
I come to visit once in a while.
I was buried a few days after my body was found. I hitched
the first pair of wings I could catch and went to Earth
for my funeral. It was pretty. A little pretentious for
my taste, but nice. There were a lot more people there
than I imagined.
Craig was there looking miserable. I found that the terrible
sick sadness I felt when Victor took me to see Craig,
at our house, had vanished. I loved him no less you understand,
but I found the feelings more manageable. Kind of like
how you eventually stop crying when you skin your knee.
The pain is still there, but you�ve sort of grown accustomed
to it.
I approached him and tried to touch him, to share his
thoughts, but I had lost that ability. I�m not a ghost
anymore, all the perks are gone. The problems however
still remain. Souls like me, what ever I am now, aren�t
really supposed to be on Earth, so to the living, we pretty
much don�t exist.
Craig didn�t react to me in the slightest. I guess that�s
ok though. It�s time for him to move on. I imagine one
day he will marry a beautiful girl, and have beautiful
babies, with those green intelligent eyes. I wish that
for him. I really do.
My mom cried a lot, but seemed mostly relieved. A year
without knowing will do that to you. After a while I think
you just want it to be over with. My dad held her close
and comforted her. More for his own sake than for hers
I think. Men like to feel needed, and that�s ok. I love
them for that.
After the funeral ended, I walked around the cemetery.
I just looked at tombstones, exploring, like I had when
I was nine, the day I met the cemetery girl. I wondered
about her. Why had she chosen to let me see her, but booked
it when my cousins came by. Foreshadowing maybe? Something
in me set off a kind of ethereal radar that sensed tragedy
even before it occurred, and she reacted. Or maybe it
was because I was willing to except a half dressed homegirl
with bare feet hanging out in a grave yard in the dead
of winter, when my cousins never would. I�ll never know.
Some questions do remain unanswered, even here.
By the time I made it back to my own grave, it had been
filled. I ran my fingers over the marker, feeling the
words carved into the stone.
Beneath my name and date of birth were these words: �I
would rather die in a hurricane, than to never know the
storm.�
I smiled. Craig�s doing no doubt. Then I heard a voice
from behind me. Soft and familiar.
�Hello pretty girl.� I turned to see Victor. No rain coat,
no bandages, no black paint, and most importantly, no
scars. He stood there smiling at me. His lovely face perfect
again.
�Victor.� I said beaming.
�I would give you a hug, but...you know.� he said with
a shrug.
�Yeah I know. Kinda frustrating huh?� I said.
�You ain�t kidding sister. I really want that hug.� he
looked genuinely disappointed. �I didn�t think I would
ever see you again.�
I smiled at him. �I miss you.�
He swallowed hard, and began to cry his own ghost tears.
�No shit?� he said.
�No shit.� I assured him. We were silent for a moment.
He wiped his non tears.
�Thank you Victor.� I said.
He nodded. Looking off into the distance. �Anything for
you.� he said, and I believed him.
Victor informed me that Charles was in the hospital, and
healing just fine. He believed our portly acquaintance
would be better for the experience and I agreed. If something
good could come from all this violence, pain and death,
then I applauded it.
We talked for a few more moments, then I had to go. I
needed to catch a pair of wings back to cloud city, you
remember.
I blew my ghost friend a kiss before I left. He smiled
and waved, fading into nothingness.
I think about Victor often. I sometimes visit him, just
to make sure he is staying out of trouble. It�s a hard
thing to wonder the earth, not being able to share human
contact. But he doesn�t complain. He says it is worth
it, to know I�m at peace.
He never retrieved his own body, and it was never found.
It lies there still, in the stinking water of that forgotten
dam. Side by side with our tormentor.
I have hope for Victor. I know, one day, a vacancy will
open in this five star hotel in the sky, and Victor will
fill it. I tell him the same thing I told Craig. You have
to believe. Because it�s all true. Whatever sweet things
you hold onto. Sometimes it just takes a while to get
here.
Nevermore
by Web
Burton (weburton@yahoo.com)
A SUGGESTION FROM THE AUTHOR. I need to mention
before you begin, that this is a subtle sequel to 'MAN
WHO LAUGHS'. So if you haven't read it, you may want to.
'NEVERMORE' does stand on it's own, but I do make mention
of characters appearing, and events that took place in
'MAN WHO LAUGHS'. At any rate, I hope you enjoy...
NEVERMORE By W.E. Burton (May 2001)
Based on situations created by
James O'Barr
FORWARD:
CEMETERY SEX AND
OTHER CRIMES
"You have
killed a sweet lady, and her death shall fall heavy on
you." -William Shakespere-
Some of you may know me. My name is Rosemary Oshidori Dylanski.
Romie to those who loved me. Once I was a girl, but I became
a crow. You might ask how a girl becomes a bird? It's an
unpleasant tale to tell.
When I was twenty four years old, my friend Victor, and
I, were murdered by a pair of low life's, who perceived
we had done them wrong. I became a ghost, and my friend
returned from his wet grave, and sent our murderers to hell,
where they belong.
I went on to heaven, when Victor finished his grisly task,
but he stayed on Earth. A punishment to himself for taking
lives, even though they deserved to be taken.
It has been ten years since that night, but I still come
back from time to time, to visit Victor, and the other people
I loved in my short life. I float down in my imaginary body,
and walk unseen among the living. I relive my life, as much
as I am allowed anyway.
I had come to earth this night to visit Craig, the sweet
man who should have been my husband. His second child was
born that night.
I saw his wife's struggle. I saw her tears.
Those forces pulling from the center of the earth. Can you
feel it?
When it was over I watched Craig and his little family doting
over the tiny new comer. A little girl who inherited her
father's green intelligent eyes.
They couldn't see me of course, but it was enough to see
him happy. He had finally let go of me completely. It was
good for him, but the thought hurt me a little. I'm still
learning to let go of him. It's easier to let go when there
is something else to grab on to.
Craig brushed his wife's blonde hair away from her brow,
and kissed her there. I remembered him brushing my dark
hair away from my own brow so he could kiss me. It was a
bitter sweet memory, but I didn't mind the bitter so much.
It makes the sweet that much sweeter. I left the hospital
room, and strolled out into the night, lost in thought.
I wandered into a cemetery, as is my habit. It's a symptom
of my condition I think. My condition being death, as it
is. It gives me comfort somehow. Color me morbid.
If you hang out in cemeteries long enough, you will observe
some strange behavior. Odd religious rituals, unusual mourning
practices, a lot of sex. Sex on top of some unsuspecting
cadaver's roof. I always turn away when I see this. I feel
guilty you see, because I once participated in that activity
during my life. Is that sick? Sick? Maybe. Fun? Definitely.
When I heard Christina cry out that first time, I assumed
this was what I was hearing. Some young woman surrendering
to love's not unpleasant desire, on top of the grave of
some long dead soul she would never know. I only wish that
had been the truth of it.
I tried to ignore the sound at first, I imagined some horny
couple balling on top of my grave, and the guilt returned.
I couldn't ignore the sounds for long. They became insistent,
the unmistakable sounds of terror.
I sought out the sounds, and I found Christina, being held
down by two men. The memory of my own murder began to surface.
I packed it down, having no desire to relive that particular
inexpensive recollection.
"No!" Christina shouted. "Let me go!"
One of the men, a scrawny, scruffy looking guy with shaggy
straw colored hair swept back from his gargantuan forehead,
punched her hard in the guts. "Shut the fuck up!" he said.
"There isn't anyone to help you out here."
Christina was immediately silent, the air forced out of
her by her assailants punch. The second man, a well built
guy with a goatee, put his hand over her mouth.
"Be quiet Christina." he said angrily. "You have this coming
and you know it."
Tears were pouring out of Christina's eyes, she shook her
head from left to right, as if to say, no, she didn't have
it coming. She turned her brown eyes to the bearded man
in a silent plea, as the scrawny guy lifted her shirt.
I wanted to help her. God knows. But one of the problems
of being dead is that, unless you have special permission,
you can't interfere with the affairs of the living. All
I could do was watch, and hope it would end for Christina
before it had ended for me.
It didn't. The scrawny guy took a firm grip on the little
ear ring in Christina's belly button and yanked it clean
out. She cried out behind the bearded man's palm, and more
tears leaked from her pretty eyes.
"Are you gonna be quiet?" the scrawny man asked. Christina
nodded. The bearded man let go. "Please Hatch..." she said
quietly to the bearded man. "Sommer has nothing to do with
us...let her go."
"Sorry sister." said the scrawny man. "She knows who we
are. Don't worry though. Ache is gonna take good care of
her." He took out a pocket knife and began to cut Christina
open. She screamed and Hatch covered her mouth again. I
turned away.
The sounds of it went on forever. I stood there, wishing
I could help, but knowing all I could do was stay with her
when it was over.
At one point I heard Hatch. "Jesus Christ, Scarecrow." he
said. And I heard the sound of Scarecrow, the scrawny guy,
laughing. Hatch left Scarecrow and Christina, and went behind
a tombstone to vomit.
"C'mon Hatch." I heard Scarecrow say from behind me. "You
fucking pussy." Scarecrow continued, under his breath now.
"Are you finished yet?" Hatch asked, sounding sick.
"Oh yeah." Scarecrow said. "She's all done."
I turned back to them reluctantly. I saw Christina lying
on her side. Her insides lying on the ground next to her.
I went to her, and knelt down beside her. I looked up at
her killers.
"You're fucking animals." I said to them through my imaginary
tears. They didn't react of course.
Hatch was staring down at Christina's body, a sick expression
on his face.
Scarecrow slapped him on the back. "Are you gonna be sick
again?" he asked.
"No." Hatch said, still staring.
"You were all for this earlier." Scarecrow said coldly.
"Did you change your mind?"
"I didn't know you were going to do that." said Hatch indicating
Christina's body.
Fresh tears were leaking from Christina's eyes, and she
blinked once. Still alive but barely, all the fight gone
from her body.
"You expected a clean execution....you should have specified."
Scarecrow said and turned away. He hollered into the night.
"Ache where the hell are you?"
There was a rustling to the left and a third man emerged
from the darkness. He was dumpy, and balding, acne covered
his baby like face.
"Quitcher yellin. I aint deaf." said the new comer. Ache
I assumed.
"The brat?" Scarecrow asked.
Ache just grinned. It was a sickening sight.
"You both are fucked up. I didn't say anything about Sommer."
Hatch said looking harassed.
"Two for the price of one, that's what I say." Ache smiled.
"Look Hatch," Scarecrow said. "We didn't know the kid was
gonna be with her. We can't let her go telling anyone what
happened to her big sister."
Hatch was staring at Christina again. "You didn't have to
give her to..." he paused for a second and glared at Ache.
"To...that."
Scarecrow and Ache both laughed at Hatch's discomfort.
"Are you sure you don't want us to take care of the boyfriend
too?" Ache asked.
"No I think you did enough." Hatch said, irritated.
"Go get the brat." Scarecrow told Ache. The little bald
man went skipping off in the direction he came. Actually
skipping, like a child.
He returned a few moments later with a limp little girl
draped over his shoulder. Every bit as pretty as her big
sister, only not quite so mutilated. He dropped her roughly
next to Christina, and the three of them left.
I went to the little girl. Sommer, they said was her name.
I could hear her labored breathing, and see a sticky substance
glistening on her face. Tears, I hoped.
How can the world be so wonderful, and so horrible at the
same time. Wonderful because people like Victor, and my
Craig have populated it. Kind and beautiful people, to whom
the idea of causing pain is foreign and sickening. And horrible
because causing pain is a religion to people like Ache and
Scarecrow, and Hatch.
"Sometimes I hate this place." I whispered to myself as
I sat there with the two beautiful, decimated girls. "You
wish you could help them?" said a voice from behind me.
I turned and saw a man dressed all in black, perched like
a raven, on a cross shaped grave marker. He was beautiful,
his skin was the color of snow, except for red lips. His
black hair hung perfectly strait, to his shoulder blades.
His eyes glimmered in there sockets, polished bronze.
"Who are you?" I asked.
The strange man leapt from his perch and approached me.
Tears had begun to spill from his bizarre eyes. "I'm Azrael."
he said.
"Angel of death?" I said.
Azrael nodded. "I know you of old Oshidori." he said.
Oshidori. My Japanese name. My mother gave it to me, and
only she used it. It was somehow comforting to hear.
"You cry for their deaths?" I asked, a little shocked at
the thought. I had always thought the angel of death would
revel in his work.
Azrael shook his head left to right. "No." he said. "I weep
because one must live."
"Sommer." I said, looking at the pretty dark haired little
girl.
Azrael nodded again. "Death is effortless, it is living
that causes struggle."
I frowned. I didn't recall my death being effortless at
all. I recalled endless sorrow and regret. "Life isn't always
a struggle." I said
"For her it will be." Azrael said. I could see his point.
But Sommer has a chance to rebuild her life. A chance I
was never given. I would give up heaven it's self for that
chance.
"Death is a release from the pains of life." Azrael continued.
He paused for a moment and looked at the two bleeding girls.
"Scarecrow and Ache will come for her when they find out
she is alive. They will finish what they started, maybe
that will be best." He turned and began to slowly walk away.
"No." I said following him. "There has to be something you
can do."
"Why would I want to? It's better for her this way." he
said walking forward, not looking back.
"It's to late for Christina, I know that. But you can help
Sommer. Can't you? She deserves a chance to be happy." I
said. Azrael continued on, seeming to ignore me. I stopped
finally, dejected. "I never had that chance." I said to
myself.
Azrael stopped. He stood there for a moment motionless as
if in thought. He finally turned to me. "Heaven is full
of souls that left life unfinished Oshidori." He said. "We
can't help them all."
I sat down on the cemetery ground. I hugged my knees and
wept. Azrael came and sat down next to me. He stared into
the distance, and sighed. "I can help them." he said finally.
"But I can't do it alone."
I wiped my tears and looked at him. "I will help if I can."
I said.
"There is no guarantee Oshidori. It is up to Christina as
well." Azrael said. "She will be asked to relive the pains
of her life. That is to much for some. And there may be
consequences. She will be returning for someone who is alive.
It isn't usually done that way, she must be prepared for
that."
"I have to try. I can't leave it like this, I can't just
walk away." I said. "Then you will be Christina's herald."
Azrael said. "If her love is strong enough."
"And what will you do?" I asked the angel of death.
He turned to me, and brushed imaginary hair away from my
face, in a way that reminded me so much of Victor. Azrael
smiled at me affectionately and said, "I will lend you my
wings."
I SIR STANLEY
"I thought
ten thousand swords must have leapt from their scabbards,
to avenge even a look that threaten her with insult."
-Edmund Burke-
So I was given, for a time, the angel of death's stygian
wings. He left me there in the graveyard, as the sun began
to rise. I was alive again, but in the form of a crow. I
was to watch over Sommer, and gather information that might
help Christina in her grim task. And when the time was right,
I was to carry her through the mists of death, back to the
world of the living, as Victor's avatar had done for him.
The cemetery's grounds keeper. came to work a few minutes
later.
He was a pleasant looking fellow, fat and ruddy. He whistled
a sad tune as he unlocked the cemetery gate. I flew over
to the gate as he unlocked it. I called to him once in my
bird voice, but he didn't seem to hear me. So I dive bombed
him, pecking gently at his scalp.
The grounds keeper cursed and swatted at me. I flew out
ahead of him, hoping he would follow me to where the two
girls lay. He didn't. He went about his business, and ignored
my cawing. So I dive bombed him again.
"Damn bird." he said waving his arms about his head. I didn't
leave him alone this time, I continued to crow and peck
at him until he chased me with his push broom. I flew to
the gravestone beneath which Christina and Sommer now laid.
"I'll teach you to peck at me you stupid bird." said the
grounds keeper, brandishing his broom like a knightly sword.
A sick, sad expression crossed his face when he saw the
two girls. "Oh no." he said simply. I crowed once, and pecked
the gravestone.
The ground's keeper knelt and felt for Christina's pulse.
He yanked his hand away from her cold flesh as if he had
been shocked. Reluctantly he felt at Sommers neck. "Jesus."
he said. "She's still alive."
The tubby little grounds keeper hurried for help as fast
as his legs could carry him. I stayed in the cemetery and
watched when the ambulance, and other authorities arrived.
The County Sheriff took the grounds keepers statement.
"There was a crow in here when I came to work...." said
the grounds keeper.
"A raven." the Sheriff corrected.
The grounds keeper looked at him as if he was daft. "Huh?"
he said.
"You saw a raven. There aren't any crows in this part of
the state." the Sheriff knew it all you see.
The grounds keeper frowned. What could matter less at a
time like this? I considered pecking the Sheriff, but decided
against it.
"Whatever." the grounds keeper said. "Do you want to hear
this or not?"
The rude Sheriff shrugged, and allowed the chubby janitor
to continue.
"As I was saying, the cr....the bird started messing with
me, so I chased it with my broom." said the grounds keeper,
who I had nick named Stanley. He looked like a Stanley.
"It led me to the girls. Almost like it wanted me to help
them." said Stanley. The Sheriff shook his head in disbelief.
"How much you been drinking?" he asked Stanley.
"Are you finished with me?" Stanley asked indignantly.
The Sheriff nodded, writing something in his notebook. Grounds
keeper Stanley, drunk? Crazy? Possible suspect.
Stanley shuffled off to his work, as the paramedics worked
to save Sommer's life.
"This one really wants to live." I heard one of them say.
I smiled inwardly. That's my girl Sommer. Give em hell.
The medics loaded Sommer into an ambulance, and drove away,
leaving poor Christina to the medical examiner. I followed
the ambulance, flying out over the little desert town that
I would call home for the next year or so.
Top five advantages to being a dead girl in the body
of a bird. In no particular order.
1) You can eavesdrop. Since no one figures a bird is going
to care (or even understand) what they are saying, their
tongues tend to be more loose. Very helpful when gathering
information.
2) You are alive again. Nuff said.
3) Since you are alive again, you can eat. I remember Victor's
crow leaping off of his shoulder to devour the peanuts set
on the table for my night clubs living customers. You can
feel hungry when you are dead, but you can't eat. Victor's
bird must have been suffering this.
4) You are possessed of a certain kind of telepathy. You
can read what the living are thinking. It enables you to
sense danger before it can sneak up on you and your charge.
I wondered how Victor's crow had known about the pistol
kept beneath the seat of our murderer's car. Now I know.
5) The living can only see you when you want them to. I
remember wondering why I was able to see the crow with the
cemetery girl, that winter when I was nine, but mine and
Victor's murderers didn't seem to notice Victor's feathered
friend at all. The cemetery girl's crow wanted me to see
her. I still don't know why, however.
I was able to enter and navigate the hospital, without being
chased by another janitor's knightly broom, thanks to advantage
number five. I flew into the emergency room, and watched
for a time, while the doctors worked to stabilize Sommer.
I decided I wasn't able to help there, so I went out into
the corridor and found a tray of that terrible hospital
food left on a cart outside some patients room. I devoured
the foul stuff. Even hospital food tastes damn good when
you haven't eaten for eleven years.
By the time I had finished my meal, Sommer was resting in
the intensive care unit. I glided into her room on Azrael's
wings, and perched myself at her bedside. I spoke to her
in my human voice.
"You just rest little one." I told her. "I'm your friend,
and everything is going to be just fine. I will make sure
of that."
A single tear leaked from the corner of her left eye, but
she made no sound or movement. Sommer turned her little
girl doe eyes to me, I could sense fear in them. Fear and
confusion. "I will take care of you." I promised. "Christina
and I." She went to sleep shortly after that, and her parents
arrived after a few moments. I left Sommer in her sad parents
care, and left the hospital. I flew over the little town,
savoring the feeling of the sun against me. A feeling I
haven't felt for eleven years.
II ONE MISERABLE YEAR
"Thy
soul shall find it's self alone, mid dark thoughts of
the gray tombstone." -Edgar Allan Poe-
It didn't rain at all for the rest of that Summer. The heat
became unbearable, dry and cracking, maddening. At the coming
of Autumn, crops failed, or rotted in their fields before
they were able to be harvested. The winter was bitter and
dry. The wind would cut through you like shards of broken
glass. And when spring finally came, it was bloomless. Life
seemed to have been sucked out of the little town. Hatch,
Ache and Scarecrow had corrupted it with their evil, it
seemed, and there would be no relief until those wrongs
had been righted.
Over that miserable twelve months I learned much about Christina.
As I have said, it's easy to eavesdrop when you are invisible
unless you choose not to be.
It seems that for the better part of her life, Christina
had been well loved in her home town. That changed though,
when she became involved with Hatch.
Hatch had a rather seedy reputation, you see, he was considered
a bad boy. Just the type of guy that could ruin a respectable
young woman's reputation. And that's exactly what happened.
When Christina started dating Hatch, her reputation was
soured. Soured to everyone in town it seemed, except for
her mother, Sommer and Bren, her childhood friend. The world
of the living can be rather unforgiving, especially when
we can't see beyond our own petty values. Christina loved
Hatch, for a time. I believe that. And as those of you who
know me have heard me say, love bites us where it bites
us, we have no control over it. Hatch was that exciting
dangerous type, the kind that all to often turns out to
be unredeemable. Christina fell for it hook line and sinker
like so many other impressionable girls have. She can't
be blamed, for she broke away, or would have, if Hatch had
let her.
It was widely rumored that Hatch and his friends were responsible
for Sommer and Christina's unfortunate fate. They were right
of course. But the lack of evidence, and the lack of competence
on the part of the local constabulary, prevented any arrests.
Many of the locals shared the sentiment, that Christina
had deserved what she got. Sommer was only an innocent bystander.
The part about Sommer was right, at least.
Bren had loved Christina more than anyone else had. Her
death was a crippling shock to him. He blamed himself you
see. They had been lovers in the last few days of Christina's
life, and Hatch had killed her for it. I sat, unseen, with
Bren many a day. He punished himself, and I felt his pain,
shared his memories.
He remembered her coming to him with rope burns on her wrists.
He winced when he saw them.
"How did you get that?" he asked, though he already knew.
Christina just shrugged and looked away from him. "It's
one of Hatch's little games." she said.
"Do you like it?" Bren asked.
"Hatch does." she answered, still avoiding Bren's eyes.
"That's not what I asked." Bren said turning her face to
his, with one gentle hand.
Christina's eyes began to flood with tears, but she held
them back. She smiled, and changed the subject. But it couldn't
be avoided for ever. As Hatches abuses became more severe,
Bren's tenderness became more appealing, and Christina eventually
made her decision. A decision that would cost her life,
and Sommer much pain. Yet somehow, it was the right decision.
Someone once said, that to gain that which is worth having,
it may be necessary to lose everything else. That is true
all to often.
Following Sommer's ordeal, she became catatonic. She wouldn't
speak, and couldn't stand to be left alone. She would weep
hysterically, and scream terrified screams when left without
the presence of someone she trusted. The local authorities
tried to question her after she began to recover physically.
Sommer would only stare at them with a blank expression,
tears rolling from her enormous eyes. After a while they
gave up, and shelved the case.
Bren did what he could for Sommer. Once a week or so he
would take her on an outing. To the park, or to the lake.
Anywhere that was peaceful, anywhere he thought she might
feel safe. He hoped that one day she would reward him with
a word, or just a smile. That would do. But it was a vain
hope. The outings would pass without incident, and Bren
would walk her home, never letting go of her tiny trembling
hand. When she was safely returned to her home, he would
walk slowly back to his own place, dejected and disappointed.
And during that ungodly year. Ache, Hatch, and Scarecrow
conspired. The little brat wouldn't stay silent for long.
And when she finally decided to speak up, it would be over
for them. They would take her, as they had done that night
little more than a year ago, before she had a chance to
talk. But this time they would be sure to finish what they
started. This time no one would find the little girl. She
would wander off, lost in her own unresponsive mind, and
never return. That was the plan anyway. Christina and I
had other things in mind.
III THE STAINED GLASS BIRD
"I wish I'd seen you as a little girl, without your
armor, to fend off the world." -Tonic-
It was a little more than a year after I found Christina
in the cemetery, when Azrael sent me to bring her back to
the living world. The gray spring had come and gone, and
the hottest part of summer was full at hand. It was a stifling
heat. The sun in the afternoon seemed to bath everything
in an orange haze, and there was no breeze. Not the slightest
stirring in the air to rustle the leaves on dying trees,
or to cool the sweat that clung to your body like ugly on
a monkey. It was wholly miserable. Even I, who had once
reveled in mostly forgotten sensation, was uncomfortable
under my inky feathers.
I had followed Bren and Sommer on an outing to a little
glen, where he and Christina had played as children. They
walked slowly through the grass toward the dry trees. Bren
held a pic nic basket in one hand, Sommer's little palm
in the other. I circled above them, unseen. One for sorrow.
They finally stopped beneath an immense cotton wood tree.
"Here we are sweetie." Bren said to the little girl. "Are
you hungry?"
Sommer made no response, she only stared forward, blinking
every once in a while to moisten her unhappy eyes.
Bren let go of Sommers hand and set the pic nic basket down.
Sommer made a little cry of fear, and grabbed Bren's one
hand with both of hers.
"It's ok Sommer. I'm not leaving you." Bren said. "I have
to spread the blanket so we can sit down."
Sommer let go of him long enough for him to spread a blanket
in the grass, then she latched on to him again. With his
free hand he reached into the pic nic basket and took out
a sandwich, cut diagonally, and wrapped in wax paper.
"You like ham and cheese right?" he asked his silent companion.
Sommer only stared forward as before.
Bren took a half of the sandwich and handed it to Sommer.
After a moment she took it, letting go of Bren, but scooting
a little closer to him. She bit the sandwich right in the
middle. Bren smiled and began to eat the other half, from
the middle like she had done.
"I have a present for you." Bren said taking an object from
his pocket. "My grand dad used to say that crow's are the
spirits of your dead loved ones sent back to earth to look
after you. So I made this for you."
He handed the object to Sommer. A little stained glass crow,
on a hemp twine. Sommer stared at it for a moment, then
set her sandwich in her lap and took the gift. She examined
it for a moment. Then a little smile appeared on her lips.
Bren smiled also, and began to cry a little from his sad
eyes. I wondered if his eyes had been so sad before Christina
was killed. I doubted it somehow.
"Now you will always have someone looking after you." Bren
said. The slightest breeze began to blow just then. Not
much, just enough to stir the leaves, and only there in
that little glen. It was as if God decided only Bren and
Sommer needed to be cool right now. The rest of the town
could suffer.
I had perched myself in the tree above them, and was watching
the goings on, smiling inwardly, the only way a bird can.
"Tonight is the night Oshidori." said a familiar voice beside
me. I turned my bird head toward the voice, and saw Azrael
perched next to me. I nodded to him.
"Fetch Christina." Azrael continued. "I will show you how."
IV THE LIVING DEAD GIRL
"She's a
killer, she's a thriller. Spook show baby." -Rob Zombie-
So Azrael sent me, once again, into the mists of death.
I found Christina wandering as I had done, before Victor
came back to earth, and somehow drug me along with him.
I glided through the mists and landed myself in front of
her. She smiled at me, a beautiful smile I had yet to see.
"Hello pretty bird." She said in a voice so genuine. "What
are you doing here?"
"I've come to take you back Christina." I said.
"Back where?" she asked.
"Back to life, sort of." I said.
An expression of discomfort crossed her face. "I don't want
to go back." She said shaking her head from left to right.
"It's peaceful here. I have no reason..." She let the words
trail off, then closed her eyes, looking sad. She skirted
passed me. I took to flight, and glided next to her as she
floated along.
"Sommer is in trouble." I said simply.
Christina stopped. "Sommer is dead." she observed. "How
can she be in trouble?"
"Your sister didn't die that night Christina." I said, having
landed before her again, looking up into her brown eyes.
Christina sat down in front of me. Or rather floated a little
closer to my level.
"You mean they didn't hurt her?" she asked me, her expression
brightening with hope. I hesitated for a moment "I wish
I could tell you they didn't." I said. Christina's expression
hardened.
"She didn't do anything. And Scarecrow gave her to that
monster." She paused for a second. "For the sake of cruelty."
She began to cry ghost tears, the kind I was all to familiar
with.
"It may happen again." I said. "Unless you come with me.
You are the only one who can help her."
"I can't go back. Can I?" she asked.
"You can, I can take you there, but you must be prepared."
I told her. "It won't be easy. You will see things you may
not want to see."
Christina stood. "I can't let them do that to her twice.
Even if it means I have to suffer."
So we were off. I flew out of the realm of the dead, out
in front of Christina who was somehow carried on the wake
of my pitch black wings. We broke into the living world
inside the gates of the cemetery where I found Christina
that grim night, one miserable year ago.
Those of you who know me, have heard me speculate that ghosts
create bodies out of there imagination. Mist like bodies
that serve no real purpose, save to give comfort to those
that imagine them. Something similar must be true for revenant
souls like Victor and Christina. Though they create stronger,
more life like bodies. Bodies that serve a purpose, revenge,
redemption, whatever dark desire it was that kept them from
their rest..
Christina appeared in that cemetery dressed all in black.
Black jeans, black leather chaps, knee high boots, a black
bodice, and a black motor cycle jacket over it all. An ammunition
belt was hung on her hip as if she were a gunslinger.
Her face was white, in contrast to her otherwise dusky complexion.
Her face was painted like a clown. Long black spikes above
and below each eye, a black smile over her mouth.
What was is with the clown motif? Three times I had met
The Crow, and three times they took the face of a clown.
A dark clown, but a smiling one. What was it? Irony? God's
little joke on evil men? Strike fear in the heart of the
enemy? Make the enemy laugh themselves into impotence? Whatever
it was, it worked. The militant uniform of the corvid.
We made our way through the vast cemetery, passed the spot
where Christina was murdered. She avoided that spot. Understandable.
I noticed a moment later that Christina had stopped. I turned
and flew to where she was, standing before her own grave.
"I found me." she said when I joined her. I landed on her
grave marker. "Am I still in there?" she asked.
"I guess so." I said with a bird shrug.
Christina smiled, amused. "You aren't much help are you?"
I just shrugged again. "I don't know much more about this
than you do. I just work here."
We left Christina's grave and headed for the cemetery gate,
dutifully locked by Stanley at the end of his day's work.
Out a ways before us on the little concrete path, stood
a figure. He, like Christina, was dressed in black, a ragged
coat and tails. A stovepipe top hat sat on his fleshless
head. Brightly colored beads hung around his neck, and he
was leaning on a crow's headed cane. The image of a masked
Mardi Gras reveler sprang to mind. Commence oh' carnival.
As we drew closer to him I was reminded of something more
familiar, more sinister. The happy carnival, party image
was replaced by one of Yorick, the death's head jester from
Victor's cruel dream.
A non existent breeze blew the coat tails out to one side
of the Yorick thing, he himself remained motionless. Christina
stopped a man's length from the strange figure. She cocked
her head playfully to one side, and smiled that genuine
smile. "Hello Voo Doo man." She said.
"You should go back little girl." said Voo Doo Man. "You
aren't supposed to be here." His voice was as I remembered,
cruel and slippery. I couldn't suppress a shudder.
Christina seemed to conceder Voo Doo for a moment, then
as if coming to a decision, pointed to his head. "You know,
you should light your head on fire, like that Ghost Rider
guy." she said skirting passed him. "It's very hip these
days...for the fashionable deaths head."
"It isn't done like this. There will be consequences." Voo
Doo said from behind us. Christina turned back to him, a
little angry. "Maybe I don't want to play it your way Casper."
she said. Voo Doo Man had turned toward us, but seemed to
remain motionless. Only his coat tails moved in that unfelt
breeze.
"Go back, before you bring more pain to the ones you love."
Voo Doo spat.
"I know who you are Spooky." Christina said. "And I know
why you are here." I had landed on her shoulder and now
I looked at her with interest.
"If I slip up I belong to you don't I?" She said. Then she
folded her arms and glared at Voo Doo Man. "It amuses you
to make us think you are here to help, doesn't it? You are
here to turn us into what we want to destroy. You may have
fooled some of the others, but you won't fool me."
Voo Doo Man was silent for a moment, that imaginary breeze
blew up, and whipped his tails violently about his legs.
"You make your own bed little girl. I have warned you."
At that he vanished.
Christina remained there for a moment, staring at the spot
where Voo Doo Man had been. Then she sighed, and turned
back toward the gate. "That guy needs to lighten up." she
said as we walked. "Maybe a vacation." I smiled my inward
bird smile.
I had figured that Yorick was some hallucination in Victor's
mind, a product of his particular psychosis. But now I was
beginning to feel that there were other forces at work in
this little drama of ours. Elemental forces beyond good
and evil. What would have happened to Victor if he had given
in to hate? I was frightened to think of it.
We reached the tall cemetery gate, and Christina swung herself
over it without difficulty. I flew over the gate and landed
on her shoulder. Together, we set off into the unbearable
heat of that ungodly Summer.
V BOOGIE MAN
"Oh
little child I love you so, that I will never let you
go, O' father help or I'll take flight, the Erl King's
clutch is cold and tight" -Johann Wolfgang Von Goeth-
Bren was a plump, handsome fellow. His eyes were the color
of faded denim, and he wore a blonde goatee that reminded
me Craig's massive red one. He wore his honey colored hair
close cropped against his skull, short and neat. Bren was
an armature artist. It was in his studio that he and Christina
spent there first and last night together.
It was after midnight when she came to him that night, but
he was up, working on some Christina inspired project he
would never finish.
"I left Hatch." she told him when she came in.
"For good?" he asked. Christina just nodded. It had been
an ugly thing her break up. Threats were made, threats to
her, and to Bren. Threats she hadn't taken seriously.
"He said he would kill me." she told Bren as they sat on
his studio sofa.
Bren's face burned with rage. "You have to tell the police
about that." he told his friend.
Christina smiled. "He doesn't mean it." she said. "It was
his last ditch attempt to get me to stay."
Bren coughed a humorless laugh. "As if threatening you would
soften your resolve."
"It has before." Christina said staring at her hands, which
were neatly folded in her lap. She could see the scars around
her wrists from many ropes that tied her to the head board.
Playfully tied, he insisted. Playfully tightened to the
point of pain. Playfully tightened until she bled.
"So why didn't it work this time?" Bren asked.
"Because I had you to come to." She said, grinning at him
and ruffling his hair.
"I hate it when you do that." Bren said. Christina suspected
secretly that he did not.
"Why?" she asked.
"I wonder if, I'm just a pet to you." said Bren a little
sadly.
"Like I'm just a teddy bear to cry on."
"Well you are kind of plushy." Christina said poking him
in his slightly rounded belly. Bren said nothing. He just
looked away from her, a glaze that threatened tears appearing
in his eyes. Christina hugged him warmly and affectionately.
He let her.
"I love you so much." she whispered in his ear.
"I love you too." Bren said meekly.
Then she began to undress him. Bren was shocked it seemed.
They made love there on his studio couch, and slept warmly
afterwards, in each others embrace.
It was this Christina was thinking of as we walked through
the streets of her little desert town, seeking Ache's ghastly
abode. I wondered to myself as I led the way, if Christina
had come back for the sake of her short love with Bren,
as much as to protect little Sommer.
Ache lived in the home he had shared with his mother, until
he killed her. He had buried her beneath the floor boards
of his basement play room. And he was glad to be rid of
her. I learned this when I listened to his thoughts one
day. I had flown above the town seeking him, so I would
know where to take Christina. When I found him he was having
a breakfast of Captain Crunch in the messy kitchen of his
home.
Ache was thirty years old, and from the time he was six,
his mother had used him. Used him in unspeakable ways I
care not to think of. This abuse had left a mark on Ache,
to put it lightly. I left him to his breakfast shortly after
I learned this bit of information. I had no desire to learn
anymore about him. I knew where to find him. That was enough.
His behavior, and his treatment of Sommer hinted at the
depth of his disturbance however. Ache was uniquely psychotic.
That much I could see without having it spelled out.
I led Christina to Ache's house. She pushed the door open
and stepped boldly inside. The place was dark. No one appeared
to be home, until we hearted the sound of someone sobbing
softly. Christina and I followed the sound to the basement
play room.
There we found a little table set for a tea party. There
was a little girl no older than Sommer seated at the table.
Her face was wet with tears, and she appeared frightened,
but otherwise unhurt. Her eyes widened when we entered.
"Are you here for a tea party too?" She asked.
I flew to the table and crowed to the girl in my bird voice.
She smiled.
"I'm here to visit Ache." Christina said. "What are you
doing here? Shouldn't you be home with your mom and dad?"
"I want to be." the girl said sadly. "But Frank says I can't
go. He says if I go he'll play rough with me..." the girl
paused here, her eyes filling with terror. "...like he did
with Jenessa."
"Who is Jenessa?" Christina asked.
"She is...was my friend. Frank put her in the toy box."
the little girl said. Christina's face twisted with the
anger I was feeling. I warbled sympathetically at the little
girl. She smiled again. "Where did you get the bird?" She
asked Christina.
"Romie is my friend." Christina said stepping a little closer
to the table. The girls face brightened a little. Wow. A
crow for a friend. She smiled at the thought. "What is your
name?" Christina asked.
"I'm Sara." the girl said.
Christina leaned in close to Sara, smiling that pretty,
genuine smile. "Sara, where is Frank?" she asked delicately.
Sara poked her thumb over her shoulder. "He's in the closet."
she said. "He's being punished for playing rough with Jenessa."
Christina nodded. "Sara, why don't you take Romie into the
living room with you and watch TV for a while, then when
I'm finished....talking to Frank, I'll walk you home."
"I can't go home. Frank says he'll play rough with my mom."
Sara said, her eyes widening with horror.
"Frank won't play rough with anyone again Sara. I promise
you that." said Christina.
So Christina and I went up stairs with Sara, turning on
lights as we went. Sara sat on the couch, and Christina
put on the television. It was some silly sit com, just something
to occupy Sara while Christina did her grisly work. I hopped
into Sara's lap, and she held me close to her, and stroked
my feathers. I was happy to give the child some comfort.
As I sat there on the couch with Sara, I witnessed the going
on in the basement, through Christina's senses.
There was a closet at the back of the basement. Christina
approached it and knocked softly on the door.
"Ache? You are in there aren't you?" Christina asked. There
was silence for a moment, then a soft childlike voice from
inside.
"Go away." the voice said simply.
"It's time to come out Ache." Christina said
"Nuh huh, I'm bein punished." the little boy voice said
sadly. "I been bad."
"That's right. You've been very bad Ache." Christina said.
"But you aren't getting off with just a time out."
"Who the fuck are you?" came the answer from the closet.
This time in Ache's voice, as I remembered from the graveyard.
"Come out and see Ache." Christina said stepping back from
the closet. The closet door began to swing open slowly.
Inside was Ache, dressed in a ridiculously sized pair of
footy pajamas. He was clutching a rag doll to his breast,
his eyes appeared cold.
"You aren't supposed to be here." he said in his own voice.
"You aint bull shitting." Christina said. "But here I am
Ache, and I need to ask you a few questions."
"Scarecrow and Hatch gutted you like meat. You can't be
here." Ache said as he stood up.
"I'm here because you and Scarecrow aren't finished with
my sister. I'm going to stop you from hurting her again
Ache. Anyway I can." Christina said.
"No, no, no," said Ache. "She's gonna start talkin again
one of these days, an we can't let her."
"You'll have to go through me Ache." Christina said.
Ache grinned. "You're a pushy bitch aint you?" he said.
His eyes went soft, watery, his mouth became a pout. He
lifted the rag doll up and addressed it. "What should we
do with her Dolly?"
he said in the little boy voice. He turned the doll toward
Christina, and I swear to you, the corners of it's embroidery
mouth turned up in a grin.
"Play rough wiff her." said a third voice, entirely separate
from Ache or his little boy voice. His lips didn't even
more. I shuddered despite myself as I sat in Sara's lap.
He produced a kitchen knife as if from no where and attacked
Christina. She fought him off, blocking blow after blow,
like a black belt. The knife never touched her. I was impressed.
Did she come with this ability? I remember Victor being
stabbed repeatedly by one of our murderers, because he had
not been a fighter in life. Was this something from Christina's
life that I had missed?
She back peddled, and side stepped Ache socking him in the
ear hard enough to nearly knock it off. The organ hung from
his head by a one inch scrap of flesh. He dropped to his
knees clutching his damaged head.
"You knocked my ear off." Ache said, his own voice returning
to him. His face twisted with rage, and he leapt at her,
leaving his charming weapon on the concrete floor. "A guy
needs his fucking ear!" he shouted as he pummeled Christina.
She had a hard time now. His attack was savage, relentless.
At one point Christina side stepped him and did a monkey
roll, grabbing the kitchen knife in the process. Ache was
on her in a second, before she could stand. He knocked her
to the floor. Holding down her arms he straddled her chest.
"Oh boy, you are fun to play wiff." said the little boy
voice from Ache's lips. Christina swung her legs up and
wrapped them around his neck, forcing him over backward.
He screamed in protest. Christina took his weapon and hamstrung
him. She pushed him away and stood up.
The crumpled figure on the floor began sobbing. "I don't
wanna play wiff you anymore." said the little boy voice.
"What were you planning to do with Sommer Ache, and when?"
"Why the fuck should I tell you anything?" Ache said in
his own voice.
"Because if you tell me, I'll go easy on you." Christina
answered.
"Piss off." Ache said.
He honestly didn't know however, Scarecrow was the ring
leader it seemed, and he kept his plans to himself until
the last minute. Until a week ago I had been able to read
Scarecrow's thoughts, but lately there had been a block.
It seemed as if some unseen force wanted to keep Scarecrow's
plans for Sommer hidden from me. It was disquieting to say
the least.
Christina shrugged. "Suit yourself, Ache. I'll just have
to get to Scarecrow and Hatch first."
Ache began to crawl towards his ungodly doll, which he had
dropped when Christina knocked his ear off.
Christina looked around the basement, finding a roll of
strapping tape. When she returned to Ache, he was cuddling
his doll, and sucking his thumb. Christina bound his feet
together with the tape. Ache didn't protest. But he began
to cry.
"I been a real bad boy." he said in the child voice.
"Yes you have. Are you going to take your medicine like
a big boy Frank?" Christina said. Ache nodded, resigning
himself.
Ache let go of the doll, and cooperated with Christina as
she bound his hands together, and then to his ankles. She
wrapped the tape around his mouth and nose, cutting off
his air supply, and drug him by his pajamas to the closet.
She placed him inside, and as an afterthought, retrieved
the doll. She shuddered when she touched it. When she touched
it, Christina was flooded with images from Ache's past.
The horrible things his mother had done to him, and the
horrible things he had done here in this basement. Things
I won't relate, because I can't bear to. She tossed the
dreadful thing in the closet with Ache and slammed the door.
Christina returned upstairs, and as promised, walked Sara
home. I stayed at Ache's house, or rather in the branches
of a dry tree in the front yard. I couldn't stand to be
in the house by myself, as silly as that sounds coming from
a dead girl.
A few moments after Christina had left, Scarecrow showed
up at Ache's front door. He entered the house, not seeming
to notice the front door had been forced open. I followed
him inside, unseen. He went to the living room, and seeing
the lights and television on, with no sign of Ache, he became
suspicious. He pulled a revolver from somewhere in his long
brown coat, and headed downstairs to the play room. He discovered
at once the trail of blood left by Ache's severed hamstrings.
He followed the viscous substance to the closet, and opened
the door.
There sat Ache in his pink pajamas, tape over his mouth
and nose, a terrified look in his lifeless eyes. Scarecrow
closed the closet door, and stood for a moment in thought.
I could only stand there and observe. My ability to read
Scarecrow was still malfunctioning.
After a moment he turned and left Ache's house. I returned
outside, and found myself thinking of what Azrael had said.
"It isn't usually done this way, there may be consequences."
he had told me. What consequences? Could that be why I had
lost my telepathic connection with Scarecrow? I had the
sinking feeling I would find out before this whole business
was finished.
VI FELINE COMPANIONSHIP
"Go
away cat, you make me smile to much." -The Crow-
When Christina returned from taking Sara home, she wasn't
alone. Every cat in the neighborhood had followed her, it
seemed. Every age, shape, gender and breed of house cat
was represented, all mewing, purring and rubbing themselves
affectionately on Christina's legs.
I flew down to her, landing on her shoulder. "What's with
the cats?" I asked. "I don't know," said Christina. "I was
kind of hoping you could tell me."
I shrugged my bird shrug. "Like I said, I don't know much
more about this than you do."
Christina sighed. "I don't suppose you could be a little
more enigmatic?" she asked me sarcastically.
I didn't respond. I didn't feel as if I was being much help
just then, so I kept my mouth shut. "I hate cats." Christina
said, staring down at her fluffy companions. She seemed
more than a little disturbed by this development.
"I don't remember cats following Victor." I told Christina.
"Maybe it doesn't have anything to do with your situation.
Your unearth I mean."
Christina sat down on Ache's front steps. The cats huddled
around her sleeping, or cleaning themselves, or doing other
catlike things. They ignored me completely.
"Who is Victor?" Christina asked me.
Maybe I shouldn't be telling her this, I thought to myself.
I remembered Victor's crow. The quiet feminine voice, sympathetic,
yet removed, never giving away information about it's self
or it's origin. Was that the way it was supposed to be?
Was I supposed to keep her wondering?
I shrugged again. Azrael hadn't given me any specific instruction
in this area, so I decided it was up to me. "Victor was
my friend." I said.
Christina looked at me confused. "But you're just a bird
right..." she said, and after a pause, she grinned. "No
I guess not, most birds don't talk." She smiled and began
to scratch a morbidly obese tabby cat behind the ear.
"I was a girl once, I had my own happy life." I told her.
"For a while anyway."
The fat tabby purred happily and leaned into Christina's
scratch. Christina didn't seem the least bit surprised to
learn that her feathered friend had once been a human girl.
Once you are dead, there isn't much left to surprise you
I guess.
"And your friend, Victor, he came back like me?" She asked
me.
I nodded. "He came back for me." I told her an abridged
version of mine, and Victor's unhappy story. When I finished,
she was staring at the chubby feline she had been scratching.
It had rolled over on it's back and was now being scratched
on the tummy. It wore a contented expression.
There was silence for a moment, as Christina continued to
stare at the cat, though not really seeing it I imagine.
She smiled sadly, and started to cry a little, moved by
some cheap memory I failed to catch. I disconnected my self
from her for a moment, giving her some privacy.
I once asked my dad for advice about Victor. "He's so unhappy
dad." I told him. "I don't know how to help him."
"Grief is a healing process Romie." my dad advised. "Sometimes
you just have to allow people their sadness. Victor will
be happy when he's ready to be." The Tao of dad. I miss
him so much.
I allowed Christina her sadness, returning to my spot in
the tree. After a few moments the cats began to wander away,
temporarily losing there fascination with the living dead
girl. The cats had all went there own way Christina stood
up. "Let's go Romie." she said. "I need to make a stop."
VII MY BOYFRIEND KILLS ME
"Choke
my faith, and stab my pride. And tell myself that this
is the last time." -Fuel-
It's a hurtful thing to be condemned for who you love. My
mom was twenty one years old when she married my dad. He
was from a lower middle class Caucasian family. My mother's
parents were first generation Japanese immigrants, and very
conservative. My maternal grandparents were appalled at
the idea of their daughter marrying into a white family.
But in the end that pleasant desire won out, and my mom
went to the man she loved, despite her family's protestation.
And as a result she was disowned, and disinherited. I never
knew my Japanese family. Many days I came upon my mother
weeping softly to herself, grieving over the choice she
was forced to make. It was unfair to her, and to me.
So I found in Christina, someone who I could relate to.
Not directly of course, my parents were always supportive
of my choices, for obvious reasons. But I could see a little
of my mom in her, though the circumstances were somewhat
different.
Christina's father had been the bad guy it seemed. He had
forced her to make that most unfair choice.
"You can be a part of this family, or you can be with him.
The choice is yours." he had told her, not seeing at the
time, that he would be forcing her into Hatch's cold arms.
She moved out of her family home and into Hatch's grim little
apartment on Seventh Street. The choice had been made.
Her father had her best interests at heart of course. And
he had been right about Hatch, even if he hadn't handled
it the way he should have.
When we left Ache's house of horrors, Christina took a walk
down Seventh Street, to the apartment she kept with Hatch.
"He isn't there now Christina." I told her.
"I know." she said. "There is something I want in that apartment."
So I followed her up the stairs and into the grave place.
The door was locked, but that means little to Crow folk.
She kicked the door in effortlessly, as she had at Ache's
house.
It was dark inside, and I was assaulted by the smells of
sloppiness, stale beer and unwashed dishes.
"Our little room on Seventh Street is getting cold." she
said to no one in particular. "He is such a slob."
Christina began rummaging through drawers and closets. I
went to the kitchen and pecked at pizza left sitting on
the kitchen table. It had grown cool since dinner time,
but it tasted good just the same.
Christina entered the kitchen after a time, wearing a black
leather dog collar, and a pair of leather hand cuffs. She
held her hands out to me as if expecting me to arrest her.
"Look what I found Romie." she said to me. I warbled in
my bird voice. She looked down at the cuffs and closed her
eyes remembering.
"It's a game." she remembered Hatch saying. "Just to make
it more interesting."
"I'm not interesting enough?" She said.
"You don't want to, is that it?" he asked her harshly. She
had given in of course. But it wasn't just a game to him.
It was a way of exerting control. Power, that's what it
was about. And after a time, he wouldn't touch her without
the cuffs and collar, or ropes, or chains, or what ever
else it was. The game became a rule. And it ceased to be
fun, to Christina at least.
She remained starring at the cuffs for a moment before a
spark of anger flashed in her eyes. She yanked the cuffs
apart, breaking the chain that bound them.
"You were supposed to love me Hatch." she said softly. She
left the kitchen for a moment, and I could hear her rummaging
through stuff in the bedroom. I flew into bedroom with her.
She was standing among the rubbish holding a bright yellow
button pin.
MY BOYFRIEND LOVES ME, was printed on the button. Only the
word 'love' was replaced by an oversized red heart shape.
"Hatch bought me this." she said, then chuffed a little
humorless laugh. "He said it was so I wouldn't forget him."
She scratched the word KILL over the heart shape with a
safety pin she took from the stuff she had scattered about,
and pinned the button to her jacket.
MY BOYFRIEND KILLS ME it now read. "Ok, we can go now."
she said. We left the cold apartment on Seventh Street,
and headed into the stifling Summer night, seeking it's
tenant, a supernatural bird that was once a girl, and a
dead, clown faced, S&M; princess.
VIII TWO FOR JOY
"I just
woke up the other night, and now I know what to do. I
guess I'll see you in Hell." -Monster Magnet-
It was Friday, and the night that Hatch, Scarecrow, and
Ache had their regular meeting. Their meeting place was
Scarecrow's trailer house. He rented a space far out in
the desert, away from prying eyes. I watched them many a
Friday night, from a big mesquite bush outside the trailer's
kitchen window, as they made their unwholesome plans.
Scarecrow fancied himself the boss of his own organized
crime family. And I suppose that was true, his 'family'
was as close as it came in this backwater neck of the desert.
The 'family' it's self was comprised of several small time
criminals and low life's scraped together from the surrounding
communities. As pathetic as the 'family' was, it's leader
was as cruel and murderous as any big time Mafioso. Christina
wasn't the first person Scarecrow had wasted, and she wouldn't
be the last.
I flew out ahead of Christina to give her some idea of what
she would have to deal with when she arrived at the trailer.
I cloaked myself from the view of the living and perched
myself in my regular spot in the mesquite bush.
Hatch had already arrived. He was leaning against his car
looking harried and annoyed. Scarecrow was not at home.
After a few minutes Scarecrow arrived in his black, hearse
like station wagon.
"Where the fuck have you been?" Hatch asked when Scarecrow
exited the vehicle.
"There was a couple of things I needed to do." said Scarecrow.
"You look nervous Hatch."
"Something bad is up Scarecrow. I can feel it in the air."
Hatch said.
"It's just the weather, you need to relax buddy." Scarecrow
said reaching into his coat. "A friend in need is a friend
indeed." he grinned, producing a fat joint from his inside
pocket, "A friend with weed is better."
"Fuck that Scarecrow. I'm serious." Hatch said.
Scarecrow's expression hardened. "You have always been a
fucking whiner Hatch. I don't know why I put up with you."
"Where is Ache? I want to get this over with." Hatch said.
"Ache is worm food. Somebody locked him in his playroom
and let him suffocate." scarecrow said without emotion.
Hatch nearly pissed his pants just then. "Holly shit!" he
said. "What did I fucking tell you?"
"Relax you fucking baby. I know who it is." Scarecrow said.
Christina had been receiving this information via my senses.
And now she snuck up on the scene and silently climbed onto
the hood of Scarecrow's hearse.
"Who is it then? Who wasted Ache?" Hatch asked Scarecrow.
"I did...honey." Christina said from where she stood atop
the hearse. The word 'honey' was drenched in scorn.
Hatch and Scarecrow turned to her. "Jesus!" Hatch said.
This time he did piss his pants. Scarecrow only smiled.
"What's the matter Hatch? Didn't you miss me?" Christina
said with an innocent pout.
"Jesus!" Hatch repeated and started to run. Scarecrow pulled
his revolver and shot a round in the air. Hatch stopped
in his tracks.
"Stay where you fucking are!" Scarecrow said to Hatch, then
he turned back to Christina.
"I knew it!" Scarecrow said. "I could smell you in Ache's
house, You stink like God you little bitch. You came back,
for what? Revenge? Because I kept you from your fat boyfriend?
Please, that is so fucking pathetic." he didn't seem at
all surprised to see a living dead girl painted up like
a clown, standing on top of his hearse.
Christina's starred him down. "Because you want to kill
my sister."
"Oh that. She would be dead already if Ache wasn't so fucking
stupid." Scarecrow said. "It's your fault you know. She
would still be a happy little girl if you hadn't cheated
on my buddy here."
Hatch stood perfectly still, half turned toward Scarecrow,
his legs poised to run, like a sprinter awaiting the starting
gun.
"If you are going to blame anyone, blame yourself." said
Scarecrow.
Christina scowled and leapt from her place on top of the
hearse. Scarecrow shot her, and the force of the blow sent
her crashing into the windshield. She didn't stay there
though, she jumped up as quickly as she went down and slapped
the gun away from Scarecrow, punching him in the throat.
He went down like a ton of bricks and Hatch bolted. Christina
picked up the gun and raced after him. I stayed with Scarecrow,
to keep an eye on him. He remained still for the moment.
Christina pointed the gun at Hatch. "Stop!" she yelled.
Hatch stopped.
"I didn't hurt Sommer." he said turning to her. "I didn't
even want her there."
"I know you didn't Hatch. Just me." she told him. "Do you
think that makes what you did to ME ok?"
Hatch had begun to cry, and dropped to his knees. "Don't
kill me." he said.
"I'm not going to Hatch. I'm not like you. I don't have
any desire to hurt the people who hurt me." she approached
him with the gun in her hand. "I killed Ache to keep him
from hurting others. It was the only way. In the end, I
think it's what he wanted. He didn't have the balls to do
it himself."
Meanwhile Scarecrow began to stir.
"What are you going to do to me then?" Hatch asked.
"Nothing." Christina said handing him the revolver. He took
it reluctantly, a confused expression on his face.
"If you think you deserve to live, than so be it." she told
him leaning in close and touching his face. She smiled at
him gravely. "I've learned a lot about you Hatch. I know
why you made me do the things you did. You wanted to be
in control. Having that power over me made you feel better
about yourself."
She stood up. "But I don't hate you Hatch. You hate yourself
enough for both of us." she said looking at him sadly. "But
I do blame you. For what happened to me, and what happened
to Sommer. So I leave this decision in your hands."
Back at the trailer Scarecrow was on his knees holding his
throat and coughing. Christina saw him, through my eyes,
and turned her head towards us. When she turned back toward
Hatch she patted him on the head playfully. "You do what
you think is best big guy. I've got more important things
to worry about."
As she turned away from Hatch he put the gun against his
own temple, and pulled the trigger, blowing his own brains
onto scruff grass. Christina sighed and walked on, ridding
herself at last, of Hatch's collar and cuffs.
Scarecrow stumbled toward the hearse. I called to Christina
in my crow voice. She broke into a run, but was to slow.
Scarecrow reached the car and dove in, starting the engine.
He raced away as Christina reached the trailer.
"Shit!" she exclaimed, and turned running across country
in an attempt to cut him off. "I should have taken care
of him first." she said.
"No regrets Christina, it isn't over." I told her. I flew
above her as she ran leaping over bushes and ditches, skirting
obstacles of every kind as if they didn't exist, and progressing
with an unnatural speed.
Christina ran onto the road in front of Scarecrow. She ran
toward the car, and Scarecrow sped up. I'll run the creeper
over, that's what I'll do.
As she and the car met, she jumped, rolling up and over
the hood of the hearse, and then running across the top
as the car sped on. She quickly reached the back of the
hearse, and reversed swinging herself down, kicking in the
glass at the hatch back, and into the back of the car. Inside
Christina grabbed Scarecrow by his oily hair and drug him
from behind the wheel. As Christina entered the hearse,
Scarecrow was just driving onto a bridge that led back into
town. The car swerved out of control without it's driver,
and went over the guard rail at one side of the bridge.
The hearse smashed into the dry creek bed below.
I temporarily lost contact with Christina's senses. I flew
down to the wreck and called to her in my human voice.
"I'm here Romie." she said. She emerged from the wreck dragging
a mortally injured Scarecrow with her by his hair.
I flew along with Christina as she drug Scarecrow down the
dry river bed. I noticed something strange. When Victor
had been injured during his brief unlife for my sake, his
injuries remained, though he didn't seem to feel them. Christina
seemed to heal. There were no marks on her body from the
car wreck, nor did the bullet wound from Scarecrow's 357
seem to show. I wondered if Victor had perceived himself
vulnerable even after his death. Perhaps his imaginary body
obliged him.
At one point a barbed wire fence was stretched across the
creek bed. Christina stopped here and twisted off several
long pieces of wire. Then she returned to Scarecrow and
drug him up out of the river bed into some hapless farmers
ruined field. Using the barbed wire and two old, wooden,
fence posts, Christina set Scarecrow up in the field like
his name sake.
She looked up at him and spoke in a tired voice. "Let's
see how many birds you can scare away." She told him, then
turned away. And as she walked out of that little dry field,
she began to hum a little song to which only she knew the
tune.
I flew above and ahead of her, the subject of those unspecified
consequences weighing heavy on my mind. Then I heard the
sound of other crows approaching. Four distinct crow voices
I heard. I was chilled for some reason, and uneasy.
AFTERWARD: GOLGOTHA SATURDAY MORNING
"You think
your head's aching? I'm not finished yet." -Godsmack-
Top five disadvantages to being a dead girl in a bird's
body. In no particular order.
1) Your
only human interaction, is with the dead soul you have
been sent to chaperon. It isn't much fun to be alive again
if you can't do the things you enjoyed doing in life.
I would have killed for a nice warm hug.
2) No opposable thumbs. You miss those...trust me.
3) People have a tendency to mistake you for a pest. Case
in point, Sir Stanley and his knightly broom. Granted
I was pecking at his scalp, but still.
4) Feathers are damn hard to keep clean.
5) Even though you can eat, you sometimes have to settle
for what ever is available, this means your occasional
spider or beetle. Repulsive, I know, but that doesn't
make it any less necessary. There isn't always pizza conveniently
left over from dinner.
One thing I refuse to resort to however, is road kill. I
remember, more than once, getting funny looks from my fellow
crows when I passed up a juicy rabbit that had been nailed
on the road, and left to ripen just so. A scornful look
from a crow would have meant nothing to me when I was human,
but the moment I got my feathers, the opinions of other
birds started to matter. It's strange how badly a person
needs to belong. Or a crow I guess.
Anyway, when I heard the four crows approaching Scarecrow's
mangled corpse, this is what I figured they were coming
for. A nice midnight snack. At least that is what I tried
to tell my self at first. I wish it had been that simple.
It would have saved Christina, and poor Sommer more pain.
I flew above Christina as she walked slowly back toward
the cemetery where she was buried. Neither of us were in
any mood to talk. I had disconnected my self from Christina,
allowing her some privacy. I was lost in my own speculation
anyway.
I couldn't shake the feeling that the voices of the crows
I had heard, was somehow ominous. It gave me a sick feeling
in the pit of my bird stomach, and somehow I knew this business
wasn't over. After a mile or so, I couldn't stand it any
longer. I had to investigate. I turned on a wing, and headed
back towards the place where Christina had left Scarecrow,
hanging on the make shift cross bound by barbed wire.
I didn't know exactly what I was expecting to find, or if
I was expecting to find anything at all. I tried to convince
myself that Scarecrow would be hanging there, with four
normal crows pecking at him. It was a hard sell.
When I finally arrived in the field, what I saw was the
fence post cross, leaning slightly to one side. There was
no sign of the crows. Nor was there any sign of Scarecrow's
body.
My mind groped for an answer. Someone had found the body,
and taken it down. If someone had taken the body down, there
would be evidence of it. I saw none. Only a set of waffle
sole foot prints sauntering casually away from the cross.
Ok then. Scarecrow had not been dead. He got himself off,
and limped away. If that were true, then the barbed wire
on the cross would have been disturbed. It wasn't. It hung
there in slack loops, as if it had been loosely wound about
the cross. None of it had been removed, it was as it should
have been. Except...no Scarecrow.
That was a stupid idea to begin with. Of course Scarecrow
had been dead. No one would have survived that wreck. And
even if he had, his body had been horrible mangled. There
was no way he could have walked away.
I ruffled my feathers and warbled absent mindedly, trying
to come up with any explanation besides the one I already
knew was true.
It was then I heard the voice from behind me. An old voice.
Thick and slippery. I recognized it at once.
"He's gone on an errand." said the voice.
When I turned, he was there. Same black suit, same ridiculously
tall hat, same colored beads, same nonexistent breeze playing
at his coat tails. The mardi gras refugee himself, my old
friend the Voo Doo Man.
"What have you done?" I asked.
"Azrael warned you there would be consequences. Now you
and the little girl will have to face them." said Voo Doo
Man. Then he tipped his hat to me, an vanished, like a whisp
of smoke blown away by his own private breeze.
"Azrael?" I said in my human voice. "Little help here?"
There was no reply. I took to the sky again, and flew back
to Christina, through the hot dry air of that ungodly summer.